It Would Be Easier If I Could Hate You
by PerfectAngels98
Summary: Len was raised for one sole purpose:to bring death to the tyrant king.Having his goal set, Len becomes an honored knight under the Prince...who turns out to be a girl. Will he go on ahead with his revenge or will love heal old wounds? Full Summary inside
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Well here is a new story brought to you by yours-truly… a.k.a me. /shot. Okay so this idea has been tumbling in my head so I had to write it or go nuts… yeah…. Don't worry I will still update ALL my stories starting by the most popular ones to the least. ENJOY AND REVIEW!**

**Summary: Len was raised for one sole purpose: to bring death to the tyrant king, the one responsible for the deaths of his mother and brothers. Having his goal set, the young avenger goes live inside the castle and works under the Prince whom a battle is like a walk in the park. Little does he know that the "Prince" is actually a girl. Will he stay true to his oath of vengeance or will love conquer all? **

**P.S: IMPORTANT! Please vote on the poll on my profile page to help me decide on a matter. See the poll if you love RinxLen or are interested in my stories.**

* * *

><p><strong>It Would Be Easier If I Could Hate You <strong>

**Chapter 1: Enter, Len the Avenger **

* * *

><p>The leaves crunched and twigs snapped under the hooves of my horse. The was barely any wind blowing, letting the cold wet branches rest. I moved the strands of golden hair from my face and breathed out puffs of warm air. It was freezing, the morning dew frozen on the leaves and grass. I could feel it… I was close to my destination. I kept a tight hold on the reins of my horse as we galloped through the still sleeping forest. The sun was steadily rising in the east, making the dew drops glitter and giving me small amounts of warmth. The trees started to lessen as we neared a cliff… <em>We are getting close<em>.

My mare stopped a foot away from the edge of the cliff. In a swift motion, I got off and looked below where the vast kingdom ahead could be seen. At the farthest end was a castle… the home of the king.

"There it is… The time has arrived for our revenge." I breathed out, unaffected by the cold. By instinct, I grabbed the hilt of my sword. "The tyrant monarchy will be no more."

My time had arrived. I was raised for this day. Today, years of careful planning will be put to use…

**{{FLASHBACK}}**

_I entered the dark room which was illuminated by the glowing coal furnace. I saw the hunched figure of my father motion me to approach. I squinted, __**how can he see in so little light?**_

_I saw something glint in his hands as I approached closer. Something long and sharp…._

"_Len, take this sword… It will be like your one and only loyal companion." My father said as he handed me a sword. I knew he had been working for days… I had seen him. His incapacity left him without a job so all he could do these days was build things at home and sell it to neighbors. _

_**So he is finally giving it to me…**_

_I stared at it. It was obviously too big for me… I was only eleven years old. _

"_Remember what you must do with it. In your hands lies the peace and unrest in not only our family but the kingdom as well. You are doing this for your mother and siblings."_

_I nodded and gulped as I took the sword with both hands. It was still too heavy for me to easily wield it with one hand._

"_Now let' begin practice…" _

**{{FLASHBACK END}}**

Ever since I could remember, one sole idea was pounded and burned into my brain: the overthrow of the King. He was the selfish cruel tyrant responsible for the destruction of my village and the death of my mother and two siblings. I will **never** forgive him for that! On that day, so many years ago, I swore to take out the king and his successor with my own hands. On that day, my life changed. I trained day by day until I had become the best swordsman in the nearby villages. It is my duty to return the peace to this kingdom.

I got back on my horse and faced the world ahead of me. "Death to the King!" I yelled out into the mountains.

My voice echoed though the trees and rock long after I had left. Today I turned sixteen; I was officially old enough to enroll in knights apprenticeship at the castle… and begin to slowly deteriorate the castle little by little, from the inside out. The plan was simple: gain the trust of the King to get close enough inside and then backstab him. Seemed easy, but it would take a while… trust doesn't grow over night. My name is Len, and **nothing **matters but my revenge… Nothing.

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

**A/N: Well that's it… I have nothing else to say… except maybe…. READ, ENJOY, AND REVIEW. I don't know if this story is good or not…. So please tell me your thoughts. Oh and visit the poll please. Hmmm… yeah its my first poll so I hope it works out.**

**-PerfectAngels98**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: New chapter! …. Yeah that's all I have to say…. xD oh and review... =3 please?**

_**IMPORTANT! : This is the order in which I will update my stories this week =**_

_**-To Be a Prince Means Trouble**_

_**-Tied by Fate**_

_**-I Just Found out I'm Addicted to You**_

_**-A Kiss that Can Take Your Breath Away**_

_**-Now Hiring Prince Charming**_

* * *

><p><strong>It Would Be Easier If I Could Hate You<strong>

**Chapter 2: Girly To A Whole New Level**

* * *

><p>After about an hour I was standing in front of the big iron gates that lead to the castle. There was guards on either side were carrying spears.<p>

"State your business boy." One of them said and immediately the first two crossed their spears in front of me.

"No need to be hasty." I said eyeing the spears, "I'm here for the knights' test."

"Knights Test? Ha don't make me laugh! You seem like the type who can't even hurt a fly. Right Phillip?"

"Yea… he has a pretty face and stuff but that stuff isn't useful in battle…especially not under the prince."

I raised an eyebrow. Not hurt a fly?...PRETTY FACE? **NOT LAST LONG**? Who do they think I am?

I took my sword out and in a single quick motion, I maneuvered it until the tip was facing the one who had called me pretty. No…I didn't build hatred towards the guy…no no way… He stared at me in shock. Didn't expect THAT now did they?

"How did you do that so fast?" The first one asked.

"Years of practice." I said somberly. It's not that I was not proud of my skills, just not happy at what they were meant for. The tip of my blade was still only inches away from Philip's face.

The first man thought I was distracted and tried to attack me from the side but in a flurry of movement I switched my sword to face him and block the attack.

"How did you see that coming?" he asked.

"As I said, years of training. Never let your guard down in battle." I said as I pulled my sword away and sheathed it.

"What is your name?"

"Len."

"Alright Len, you may enter. We will be rooting for you to reach the finals."

I nodded and was about to pass through the open gates hen the first guy stopped me.

"Hey lad, lemme see your face."

My eyes narrowed and I turned to face him.

"Yeah, your right Philip, he does resemble the prince." He said as he studied me.

I raised an eyebrow and they let me pass_. I look like the prince?_ I wandered through the stone tunnel until I reached an open court.

There was about twenty other guys there about my age or older. On a small platform was a slender boy, he was pacing back and forth. He had blond hair that reached up to his chin… Just like mines except that he had it loose while I had it tied. The guy had sea blue eyes and a small framed face. Hah, they said I looked girly, look at this guy! He took girly boy to a whole new level!

He had on an expensive looking navy uniform. His blue cape was flowing behind as he walked back and forth on the platform. I got closer so I could hear what he was saying.

"As I said before, out of the lot of you only ten will be selected to by my men. Those ten will be known as the Black Knights, my special attack group, stealthy and deadly as the approaching night. Out of those five, **one** will become the Knight of the Royal Guard… which simply means my right handed man and leader of the Black Knights. I wish you the best of luck on this test." He swiftly turned around and unsheathed his sword, "Let the tournament begin!" He said as his blade cut through air. The crowd cheered and I felt excitement build up inside me. Not only will I be able to carry out my plan but I will also be able to test my skills after many grueling years of training.

"Line up and receive your number, we will then conduct matched among numbers to see who will be left." The boy said and then proceeded to get off the stage in one leap. As if on cue, two men entered carrying a box. The guys began to line up so I followed them. The men each had a box so the line moved quickly.

It was finally my turn and the man eyed me before giving me the box. The same boy from earlier came up to me. He looked startled at first but then shook away whatever idea he had.

"You're entering as well boy?" He asked me. Boy? Ha, don't make me laugh, he looked around my age as well!

"I don't see why I can't." I spat. If there is anything I hate more than the Royal Family it is fools who think they are better than someone else just because they are of higher class.

"Let's see how you do… frail boys aren't good knights." He scoffed.

FRAIL? Did he ever look in a mirror? Even his voice is soft like a woman's! Now that I got a better looked at him… he was really girly looking… like really. He even had hair pins to keep his hair in place!

"Your Highness, you should go up to the dirt arena to overlook the contest."

He nodded and turned away. I sneered, "Frail boys aren't good knights." I mimicked. So he is the prince, eh? Pretty _girly_ and _fragile _to be the head of the knights department, if you ask me. So this is my enemy… a guy who looks like a girl. I'll show him not to mess with me. He will be easy to take down… Easy as one, two, and three…

I looked down at my number: 13. Well let's see what happens…

I walked over to the dirt arena where I found all of the others seated around a small circular dirt area.

"First match! 2 vs. 10!"

Two boys stood up and went to the dirt area. "Rules are simple. Fall out the circle, lose. Drop your sword, lose. Forfeit, lose. Anything goes besides maiming. Having said that, let the first match begin!"

I expected to see a real good match but it ended in minutes. The second guy pushed the other back until he lost his balance and fell out. I could tell the latter wasn't very experienced with a sword.

The matches after that were a bit more interesting… a bit.

"Last match of the preliminaries, 13 vs. 5!"

Well it's about time they called me… I got up and walked over to the center of the dirt area. I faced my taller opponent who was taller than me by a few inches. He smirked when he saw me. He took off his green cloak. Heh, what is he trying to play at? I kept my fur lined cloak in place.

"Don't cry when you lose little girl."

"Heh, in your dreams…"

"READY," we both unsheathed our swords.

"AND," we pointed our swords towards each other.

"…STRIKE!" The sound of clashing metal resounded throughout the arena.

I backed up a little to the edge of the circle but not so close that I could easily slip and fall out. My opponent saw this as a sign of weakness and charged towards me… his brown hair running wildly. I looked both my escape routes…not enough time…

I decided to stay put and let him come towards me. I placed my right foot a few inches behind and my sword in front of my chest, getting ready for the upcoming impact.

Our blades met with a loud CLANG! I did not budge from my position though my balance was wavering. That's when I got an idea…

After five minutes of just plainly blocking each other strikes, I ran to the other extreme of the area. The guy looked shocked as I began to run straight at him. Just seconds before our swords met, I side-stepped, and switched my sword from my right hand to my left hand before I placed the tip at his side… he didn't even have a chance to react.

"Drop your sword…" I ordered. He gulped and let it clatter on the floor.

"Winner number 13!"

The crowd cheered. This is going to be easy…

I sat down and drank water from a wooden cup.

"You also made it this far?" The guy besides me asked. I turned my head to face him. He looked about two years older than me. He was well framed and had blue hair with matching eyes… no not blue like mines but a much darker shade.

I nodded. "They say there is a special test to find the Knight of the Royal Guard. We don't have to worry though, we already made it into the Black Knights." He said.

"Oh, I haven't even introduced myself," he said thoughtfully, "I'm Kaito… say we can be friends!"

"Len." I muttered, not really interested in making friends. I didn't need them…

Someone approached us and we raised our hands to block the sun so we could see the figure better. The dark silhouette of the prince was standing in front of us.

"Congratulations on making it this far… Welcome to the Black Knights," he said in his "manly" voice. This guy… did he expect us to take him seriously with THAT face and voice? If it weren't for his fame as a ruthless prince I would've thought it was a girl in a man's attire… seriously.

"Now for the ultimate test to decide the Knight of the Royal Guard… You must survive at least five minutes against…" the Prince said as he took out his sword, "me."

"What? YOU! " a man from behind us said, "B-but you're known for being the best swordsman in the kingdom! You charge into battle without fear… We can never win!"

"No one is forcing you to join… I don't want cowards among my knights." The Prince hissed, his eyes turning a cold fierce blue…

"Those who do not wish to try out for this great honor may retreat…Though you will still keep your current position."

Out of the ten present, only three decided to try… The others had left to hide in an inconspicuous corner. It was me, Kaito, and some guy with purple hair.

"Well who is going first?" The Prince asked.

"Well this shouldn't be too hard. I'll go first." The purple guy said. I looked up into the sky… The sun's rays caressed my face. It felt nice and calming… When I turned back to the fight, the guy was on the floor.

"What happened?" I asked Kaito.

"I BLINKED AND MISSED IT!" he exclaimed.

Kaito continuously looked back and forth between the smug looking Prince to the ashamed guy. How had he defeated him so easily?

"Next." The Prince said in a bored tone.

"What if we don't last against you?" Kaito asked cautiously.

"Then you would be wimps not to stand against someone like _me_." he said with a hint of sarcasm. _Someone like me?_

Kaito also looked confused as his blue eyebrows furrowed together. "I will just keep on searching okay?" The Prince sighed as he rubbed his temples. "So who is next?"

"Me?" asked Kaito

"Sure, get over here." The Prince said, not amused.

As soon as Kaito was within boundaries he rushed towards the Prince, waving his sword around, probably trying to catch him off guard. The prince kept his stony gaze and didn't even change his stance to block the upcoming attack.

"RAAAGH!" Kaito yelled as he neared the Prince.

It happened really quickly… Before Kaito could aim the sword, the Prince rolled over on the floor and came up behind him, the tip of his sword against Kaito's back. Kaito lost his balance and fell out of bounds.

Kaito mumbled something about "inhuman" and left to sit with the purple haired guy. It seemed like the two groups were labeled: too chicken to fight the prince and beaten by the prince. The Prince sighed and in a quick motion pointed his sword towards me.

"You're next."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Well that was it for this chapter… hmmm wonder when he'll find out the Prince is a girl….hmmm… xD Please read and review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: New Chapter! Hahaha, yeah that's all I have to say :D**

…**oh and also reviews? Or poll?**

°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°

**It Would Be Easier if I Could Hate You**

**Chapter 3: A Pact under the Moonlight**

°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°

I gazed at him, our eyes meeting, sea blue clashing with cerulean. His eyes reflected the glow of his sword which was currently facing me.

I was taken a back. Never had I seen a color like that before... W-well at least not in a guy. Yet they lacked something... Had a void similar to mines... Lacking an emotion...

"Are you just going to stand there?" He asked, snapping me out of my trance.

"N-no." I mumbled and took my sword out of its scabbard.

"Pathetic..." I heard him say and I immediately tensed... No one must say THAT about me... Not again.

"Let's begin then, your highness." I said, making sure to emphasize the last two words.

"READY, SET, STRIKE!"

Clang! Our swords clashed together, creating sparks of light. He pressed his weight against his sword, trying to push me back, but I kept my ground. He gracefully crossed to the other end and stood there. I ran towards him, but instead of raising my sword I kept it low, almost touching the ground. About a foot before I reached him, he side-stepped, probably trying to pull off the same move from earlier, and I took a sharp turn. That left us both once again on opposite sides. This was not going to be easy...

We were on the same level... Every time I tried an attack, he blocked it and vice versa. We weren't getting anywhere. I noticed beads of sweat on his forehead and knew he was having a hard time too.

I was breathing heavily, and I could hear his soft pants every time we neared each other. I dodged his blade for the tenth time, this is getting tiring...

"FIVE MINUTES!" Kaito exclaimed and the watching crowd cheered. I let my sword clatter on the floor... I did it...

The prince hunched over and places his hands on his knees for support, his golder hair covering his face.

Kaito approached me and handed me a cup of water. He clapped me on the back, "Well done Len! You are the Knight of Royal Protection!"

"Yea! You survived under the inhuman prince!" The purple haired one yelled.

I weakly nodded, I was so tired.

"Make room."

The guys turned and formed an opening. I didn't even have to turn around, I knew who it was already.

"Congratulations, you are the Knight of Royal Protection... Though I thought it would've been someone else. Hmmm, seems you aren't as frail as you seem."

I just nodded in response, if I spoke I would probably say something stupid that would get me kicked out. As you probably know, I am not the one to make those mistakes.

"I will now take you to your dorms. You will clean yourselves and then meet up in the throne room to swear allegiance to me and my father."

At the mention of the king my jaw tightened, as if from instinct. Hmm, I have to think of a good plan to bring him down...

"Len, let's go." I heard Kaito say.

I followed the blue haired guy until we reached the dorm building. I scanned the brick walls and looked at all the passages... Not very spacious.

"You will be grouped in pairs and assigned a room." The prince stated.

I waited in line until my name was called. The prince looked at me before telling me both my room number which was upstairs. I swiftly went up the wooden curved staircase. I went inside the room with the number 8 engraved in it. I found Kaito inside looking around. So he is my roommate then?

"Ah Len, it seems we'll be roommates from now on. Oh you can take a bath first."

I nodded and went into the bathroom. I filled the tub with water and let the warm water wash my tiredness away.

When I got out to get my clothes I found Kaito sitting on one of the beds, unpacking his stuff. He turned to see me and dropped the shirt he was holding.

"L-len?" He asked.

I stared at him, puzzled, "Yeah?"

"Oh thank god, I thought you were the Prince! You look just like him with you're hair down!"

I sighed and went to go look at my reflection on my blade... Crap, I did look like him...

I blushed and quickly dressed, putting my hair in its usual pony tail. Do I seriously look as girly as that guy?

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

We all gathered into the throne room, shiny and clean. Like seriously, the purple guy seemed to be bleeding sparkles. Our boots made soft clanks on the delicate glossy floor. The prince and a man were already already standing on the platform in front of their thrones. The king, a thought in my head sneered.

We lined up horizontally, and each stood looking at them reverently, except me. Was I the only one staring at them with eyes full of hate, resisting the urge to cut his throat? Yes, probably yes since nobody else came here to avenge their village and most importantly their lost ones.

"Sir Gakupo Kamui, do swear loyalty to your king and prince, promising to aid and protect them when the time is right?"

"I, Gakupo, swear loyalty to my king and prince, ready to always be at thei side."

I realized I was next. Had I been thinking so long that the line has already climbed up to me? I don't want to be a man of false word, but this is an exception. I will not be loyal to the king, I would rather first_die_.

"Len Kagamine, do you swear loyalty to your king and prince, promising to aid and protect them whenever the time is right?"

"I, Len, swear loyalty to my king and prince ready to always be at their side."

I sweat dropped, sounds like we're getting married more than swearing loyalty.

"With that, all of the Black Knights are now ready to serve the my son and me as well."

We bowed in syncronicity and one by one filed out the throne room.

The prince took us out back behind our dorm room, far away from the eyes of the common workers.

Once there, he motioned us to stop and we stood there, the breeze ruffling our hair.

"What we just did," the prince started, "shouldn't be of importance to you. It was just formality."

We all looked around among ourselves, trying to figure out what he meant.

"You are not and will not be loyal to anyone besides me, got it?"

"What about the king?" Gakupo asked.

"My father has enough people under his reign. You will not answer to him!" The prince said with some resentment in his voice, and a hint of anger?

We gulped and nodded. The Prince was expelling an ominous aura that seeped into the cracks of our hearts and sparked fear within us. He musn't be such a bad guy if he is against his father now can he? Maybe, just maybe, he could help me in my revenge.

"Ummm, what can we call you your Highness?" Kaito asked.

"Ren."

I raised an eyebrow. Ren isn't a very common name, just like mines.

"Yes, Prince Ren."

"Now let's begin sword practice shall we?"

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

"Um, Len, don't you think the prince is a bit er- feminine?"

I looked up from the book I was reading. We were in our dorm room, Kaito on his bed and me on mines. The setting sun was slowly entering through the small window, illuminating our faces.

"Ehh?"

"N-no! Don't think I'm you-know it's just that I think the prince is... Er- pretty?"

I stared at him in plain disbelief. Did I have a gay roommate?

"Don't stare at me like that!" Kaito said while blushing, "It's not like you didn't think that too!"

I actually blushed. Like seriously, I never blush. NEVER.

"W-well I..."

His lips formed a knowing smirk and he questioned me with his gaze.

Okay so it's not like I HADN'T thought about it... Just not like that. I mean, he DID look feminine and stuff but come on, he is a GUY. Though he had small pink lips, a small framed body, and beautiful blue eye- NO! SNAP OUT of it! He is ugly and evil! I am an avenger, not a hormonal guy!

"Len?"

"Uh, sorry Kaito what were you saying?"

"Ugh, never mind. Are you happy about being the Knight of Royal Protection?"

"Uh, yeah sure... I guess."

"You aren't really a talkative guy are you?"

I shrugged. I never had actually needed to talk much before. All my time had been focused on training. Thanks to that, I lacked many common emotions besides hate. Like happiness... that is a concept I've yet to understand.

"You're spacing out again..."

"Sorry." I mumbled.

There was a soft knocking on the door. Kaito got off of the bed and answered it. Meh, it's probably Gakupo or a-

"Prince Ren, come in."

Wha-? The Prince?

"I need to speak with Len." He said as his eyes swept the room, like a radar looking for a certain blonde target.

Me? What did I do?

Kaito looked at me with sympathy in his eyes. It's not like I'm going to get killed or anything... Right?

I got off the bed and followed the Prince outside in silence. The empty halls were filled with only the sound of echoing footsteps.

He stopped walking and I stood there, the erie silence weighing down on us.

"Look, I'm going to need you to follow my orders no matter what, got it? If you don't like it then you can resign your post."

"I have no problem."

"Good. We may do some training that excludes the others, which means either at midnight or dawn. Are you still up for it?"

I nodded. Though the the special training made me a bit skeptical but I had no other choice. It was my only ticket towards revenge.

"Okay, we begin tomorrow." Ren said and extended a white gloved hand.

I nodded once again and shook his hand. The sun had escaped into the shadows, leaving the glowing moon to play. Glove meeting flesh, two destinies intertwining together. A pact in the darkness, approved only by the shining moon.

**A/N: Hope you liked this chapter! Hmm, wonder how long it will be until Len finds out the real identity of "Prince Ren" xD We'll just have to see…**

**Reviews, anyone? Come on, you know you want to~**

…**for a cookie? X3**

**-PerfectAngels98**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: *dramatic music in background* AFTER A LONG ABSENSE IT IS I… *music dies suddenly* screw that! I am back my lovely readers~! Sorry for the long wait! You know what? I made you wait so long I'll just stop talking now… ENJOY~! ….and review? Please?**

**p.s: this is the longest chapter of this story so far… 8,000 words… awesomeness… xD**

**P.P.S: PLEASE VOTE ON THE POLL ON MY PAGE~!  
><strong>

**ENJOY~!**

* * *

><p><strong>°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°<strong>

**It Would Be Easier if I Could Hate You**

**Chapter 4: Rin Kagane**

**°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°**

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

I slowly opened my eyes and they soon got adjusted to the darkness. I blinked a few times and sighed before throwing the blankets to the side. I sat on my bed and felt the small drawer besides me for my hair tie. Once found, I got it and tied my hair back in a ponytail. I rubbed my left eye and yawned silently. Kaito stirred in the other side of the room, mumbling to himself. For a moment I thought I had woken him up but then he began to lightly snore so I knew that wasn't the case.

Getting dressed quickly, I got up and retrieved my sword from where it leant on the side of the drawer.

I looked up at the clock and I could barely make out the time: 12:15.

"I wonder if Prince Ren is already outside." I mumbled to myself.

Finally finishing tying my boots, I silently exited the room.

I swiftly climbed down the stairs, taking two at a time, and left the dorm room. It was almost morning and I didn't want to wake the other knights.

The cold morning air welcomed my face and I took a look at the breathtaking sky. Dark blue was spotted with twinkling silver specks. The moon placed a warm blanket of light over everything within view. It was a beautiful sight and even someone focused solely on revenge could appreciate it.

"Beautiful sky it is tonight."

The voice startled me and I looked to the side. Sharp piercing sea blue eyes stared at me. The soft wind rustled his golden locks and the moon illuminated his face.

"Prince Ren..."

"Even the bravest knight and warrior must stop to admire the world around him. Not everything is blood and war." He said serenly, his gaze fixated on the moon.

I stayed silent and also looked at the moon. Maybe he didn't know it but the words he had spoken were truly wise. Prince Ren was known as a cold ruthless warrior but he had a side to him that nobody easily saw. I realized this as he stared longingly at the moon, his mind miles away. This was one of those moments in which the prince was most vulnerable. Something inside me clicked, but the emotion was alien and I couldn't comprehend it.

Was it curiosity?

Was I curious to know more about this guy who had the same empty look in his eyes that I had?

I had been training with him in private for more than a month and usually he was silent. Today, he seemed more open. Well can't say I really know about that stuff since I myself do not talk much. The only people I talk to is my roommate Kaito, Ren, and sometimes Gakupo. He is a very mysterious guy, Ren... Just like myself. We both weave webs made of intricate secrets and lies. You could tell just by looking at our eyes...

"Are we going to spar, then?" Ren asked, getting on his feet.

"Uh, yeah." I mumbled and also got up.

Outside the dorms was a big sand sparring circle made just for that: practice sparring.

Ren stood approximately 10 feet away and took his sword out of his scabbard. I mimicked his actions and we both stood facing each other, blades reflecting the silver light of the moon.

"Start!" He hissed and struck his sword against mines.

I gritted my teeth and quickly changed my footing to provide balance against his sudden attack. He was being extra challenging today. I could barely try to attack for most of my time was spent dodging and blocking his slashes.

Not even ten minutes had passed and we were both already slightly panting and sweating, our swords still raised, showing no sign of defeat.

"Y-your attacks are weak!" He yelled and ran towards me, wielding his sword wildly.

Seconds before he slashed out, I squatted and then rolled over, his attack missing me by a hair.

"And yours are predictable!" I yelled back and waved my sword at him.

I felt the adrenaline run through my veins as I ran towards the blonde prince. This is what I lived for: fighting. My father had taught me nothing else than how to wield a sword, the flames of hate dancing along the metal. Fighting against Ren tested my skills against the best of the best. Knowing I could stand and fight against him filled me with unimaginable pride. Every day he became stronger and every day I matched his improvement. I knew that as the days passed I got closer to my goal.

"Don't daydream during battle you idiot!" He said and once again his sword sliced air.

The sound of metal clashing against metal resounded throughout the empty arena.

"Ngh-" I heard Ren mutter as he turned his sword hilt with a flicker of his wrist and he added extra weight to his stance.

"Ren..." I said through gritted teeth.

"Shut up and focus on counter attacking! You always need a way out!" He said and with another flick of his wrist he knocked my sword out of my tight grip.

My eyes widened as I stared at my blade which now lay on the floor. I stared at Ren in a bewildered manner and I couldn't formulate words.

That was the first time in my whole life that someone had managed to knock my sword out of my hands...

I overestimated the Prince. I somehow let my guard down... Yeah! That was it.

"Defeated that easy? Come on, are you even trying?" Ren mocked.

My eye brows furrowed into a frown and my eyes were filled with determination as I picked up my fallen blade.

"That is the LAST time it will happen!" I spat and once again took a powerful grip on my weapon.

"Don't make empty promises!" He yelled and his blue eyes sparked fury.

"I am a man of his word!" I exclaimed.

"Let's see then!"

"As your knight it is my duty to improve and protect you!" I said.

"That's what I wanted to hear!" Ren exclaimed and smiled broadly.

"What?" I asked out of plain shock. What was he talking about?

"You passed the first test."

"What first test?" I asked, still not understanding the matter.

I felt so stupid right now it's not even funny. The Prince gave a slight giggle that seemed... _Girly_?

"It was a test to your loyalty and determination. Any other person would've replied that they were no match for me, they were sick, etc... But none would admit their mistake and promise to train harder to beat me. The protection part was just extra credit."

"So... You mean this wasn't a test on strength?" I asked, slowly putting the pieces together.

"Yeah... And you passed. I knew you were fit for the job."

"Er-thanks?" I muttered, still kind of confused.

"Go back to sleep. Practice ends here. Tomorrow is going to be a hard day."

"Yes, Prince." I said in an authorative voice.

"Just Ren... Geez, we're going to be working together for some time so cut the prince crap."

I blinked rapidly. Is this really Prince Ren?

Ren's eyes widened as he realized what he had just said.

"J-just you can call me that because you're the knight of honor! Er- I mean... Go to sleep!" He exclaimed and stormed off, mumbling under his breath.

As I kept his retreating figure in sight a curious thought seeped into my mind...

Was Prince Ren trying to be..._nice_?

Woah... Didn't know that was possible! Wait... I said I would protect him... when my mission is to obliterate his father... Was I also being... N-nice? Agh! The world as I know it is coming to an end!

I bet this is what happens when you get sleep deprived... You start being..._nice_.

I entered the dorm building and slowly went back up to the room. I can't believe Ren ended practice so quickly. He usually made me exhausted and then laughed at my weak stamina. I didn't even get fully undressed and just climbed back into bed.

Prince Ren sure is weird.

* * *

><p><strong>Ren's P.O.V<strong>

I made my way towards the castle which wasn't very far from the knight's quarters.

The guards bowed as I passed and with a flick of my wrist they straightened.

"Ay, how is the lad coming along?" The first one asked.

"He is doing an excellent job," I stated, feeling a bit of pride as I spoke about Len, "he is very skilled with a sword."

"Ay, we saw his match against your majesty."

"Yes, now if you excuse me, I must get to my bedroom."

"Alright, your Highness, have a good sleep."

I nodded and entered the castle. Quickly, I found my way throughout the dark castle and reached my bedroom on the second floor.

Sighing, I turned the cold knob and entered my room. I silently closed the door behind me and breathed in deeply.

Another day of training... Another day of lies and deceptions.

I took my scabbard off of my uniform and placed it on the nightstand near my bed; always good to keep it near.

I walked up to the mirror in my room. Absentmindedly, I reached down and untied my boots. After kicking them off, I stared at my reflection in the mirror.

"Prince Ren..." I muttered as I saw the boy stare back.

Slowly, I began to unbutton my uniform jacket and I placed it on the hook near the mirror. After that followed my long sleeved dress shirt which was also placed on the hook. Still staring at my reflection, I slowly took off my undershirt as well...

I was left bare with only tightly wound bandages around my chest. No, I wasn't hurt... They were meant to hide a sign of my weakness.

I reached out for my sleeping shirt and slipped it over my head and onto my chest. Then, slowly reaching from behind, I slowly loosened the tightly wrapped bandages. Soon, the round shape of breasts started to form.

It's true... I am a woman.

I once again looked at my reflection, now seeing someone completely different.

I saw Rin... My weakness.

While I saw Ren a moment ago, now I only saw Rin. That is who I am. Ren, the lie and Rin, the weakness.

My life is full of lies... All lies... I myself am a lie.

I placed the bandages into a drawer and shut it.

My father turned me into this. I would've never wanted this to happen. His selfishness turned me into a whole different being who is made up of deceptions. I am a fake...

Ren is a mere lie to the world, and Rin is a frail girl who is good for nothing...

Who am I really? Do I have to be one or the other? Or can I be both?

I ask myself this question on a daily basis, hoping that maybe someday I'll find an answer.

"Rin or Ren... Who is the real me?" I whispered into the lonliness of my room.

Ren is the strong part of me. He doesn't back down against anything and has the power to change things. Ren is respected by all...

Rin is the weak part of me. She is easily flustered and isn't strong at all.

Being a girl is a weakness when you fight against the cruel world. Nobody listens to a girl... A girl has no power.

That is why Rin is locked up away in a secluded part of my heart. Ren is the only one who is allowed to surface.

And that is how I will live... I will be Ren... And change the world around me.

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

I tossed and turned in bed. Sleep wasn't coming to me. My forehead was covered with a sheet of cold sweat. I had just dreamt of that fateful day that changed my life.

I looked at the clock through the small light that the moon provided: 3:40.

We didn't start practice and breakfast until 7:00. That left me with three hours of sleep left. If Ren said the day was going to be hard tomorrow I should get as much rest as possible. But the haunting dream still paralyzes me even though I am awake...

I dreamt of the day when they killed my mother and two siblings.

(Flashback)

"Len! Get your sister and your brother! Leave here immediately!" My mother cried as she ushered me out of her room.

"What's happening mom?" I asked, being ten at the time.

"The King's army has come to destroy the village. They fear our strength for we are a fearsome swordsmen people. They fear that we might revolt and destroy the kingdom. That is why they have decided to destroy us first before that happens." She explained as she held me at arm's length.

"So we are leaving?" I asked her, my face showing horror at what she had just told me.

"No my love," She said and wiped a tear from her eye, "You and your siblings are leaving. I must stay and fight long enough for you to escape far from here."

My eyes widened with realization. Outside the house screams could be heard and windows being shattered.

"No... No mom..." I said as I knew what she was trying to say.

Her golden hair tickled my nose as she leaned and planted a soft kiss on my forehead, "Be brave my son. I love you dearly my Len. Don't ever forget that."

Tears began to roll down my dirty cheeks and I embraced my mother tightly, not wanting the moment to end.

"I love you too mother."

Someone began to pound on the door and my mother's blue eyes flickered pure terror. She pushed me out of the room and I found my little siblings ready to go. My mother led us to the back exit and kissed us on the cheek.

"Genevieve! They're in here!" My father's voice bellowed from the other room.

My mother reached behind the kitchen table and proceeded to retrieve a long sword with a red hilt. Then she took out a shield with the Kagamine emblem on the front. Pitch black shield with golden inscription.

"Get away from here, now!" She ordered us, her blue eyes showing panic yet determination.

"But moth-"

"NOW!"

I gulped and taking my sister's hand and brother's I walked away at first and then began running.

I heard my mother yell and I froze in my tracks. I whispered to my siblings that they should hide behind the old crate next to us. They nodded and stayed silent while I went ahead to see if it was dangerous.

I realized that my house had begun to catch fire. There were two soldiers standing in front of our house. I saw my father fall, followed by my mother's crumpling form... No... No...

I knew I had to stay with my siblings but I just had to stop them from killing my family! My heart torn in two, I jumped up and ran towards the soldiers.

"Hah! Is that all you got?" The soldier mocked, "The Kagamines weren't much of a threat after all."

"MOM!" I yelled and ran to her side.

"Mommy!" I heard my siblings cry and with a sinking heart I realized they had followed me.

"Kids... Run... Away..." My mother spoke softly.

I looked around for her injury and found the side of her golden dress dyed a deep crimson red.

"Why did you do that to our mother?" My little brother cried and charged towards the soldiers.

"No!" I cried but it was useless. The soldier easily pushed him away and his head hit the edge of a rock.

My heart froze in terror as I saw his blue eyes close and his pink cheeks lose their color. No... No... Why did he have to die? I was supposed to have protected him! I didn't even have hope that he had survived. There is a limit to how much a five year old can take.

"REI!"

No answer.

Meanwhile, my little sister Rui had crawled up to my mother now lay there, unmoving.

With a trembling hand I reached down and tried frantically to find a heartbeat.

Rui had been sick...the cold made it worse. Plus, Rei had died and people always said twins had a special connection that tied them together. They both had my mother's eyes but had my father's black hair. They were twins, born on the same day.

"L-Len..."

I looked down to see my mother's paling face.

"What is it mother? Don't speak! You'll lose energy!" I cried frantically.

I placed her head on my knees and one of my hands was now stained with her blood. Snow started to fall, making everything around me even colder.

"Take care my son. Don't ever give up. Stand up for what you believe in. I-I'm proud of you Len." She whispered and then her eyes lost their shine. Only dark, empty blue orbs were left that were once filled with life.

Tears continued to roll down my cheeks. My father lay on the floor a few feet away. I closed the eyes of my dear mother and caressed her face for the last time. Then, I took a hold of her bloodied hand and found that she had something inside it. It was a pendant...with our family crest. I cried as I slowly put the pendant around my neck. Why did this have to happen? Why? My family never hurt anyone! We were a peaceful village!

My eyes were filled with dark hate as I saw one of the soldiers wield a sword dripping with crimson blood. The blood on that sword... It is the blood of my loved ones... The blood of my village!

I stood up and wiped my tears away, leaving myself with a blood stained face.

"GAHHHHH!" I cried in rage as I ran towards the soldier.

I heard the soldier laugh and he raised his tainted sword, ready to end my life as well. I smiled, this would be a blessing. I wouldn't be all alone... I could see my family again...

I closed my eyes and waited for the impact. Losing my life meant nothing now that there was nothing left in the world for me.

The sound of clashing metal made my eyes jolt open. Before me stood a girl, holding a sword that had blocked the soldier's attack. She had blonde hair that reached just below her chin. She seemed about my age...

"What is the meaning of this?" She exclaimed.

"Your Majesty! What is the princess doing straying away from the general?" The soldier inquired.

Princess? So she is royalty! But why is she-

"I told you not to call me that repulsive name!" She spat.

"Y-yes, your Majesty." The soldier mumbled.

"Sheath your weapons!" She cried and they obeyed.

Then, she turned around to face me and offered me a hand. She had sparkling blue eyes the color of the sea… I took her small hand and got to my feet.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

"Y-yes. Thank you." I muttered, still surprised that a girl my age could wield a sword when I could barely even lift one up.

"Were you intending to kill him?" She yelled and looked at my family, "Did you two kill this family?"

"P-princess, it was on orders of the King-"

"He never said he would completely obliterate the village! He said he would stop a rebellion but from what I see this is a massacre!" She raged, her sea blue eyes burning with a passionate hatred.

"We had orders-"

"Even the innocent children?" She asked, her eyes filling with tears as she saw the corpses of Rei and Rui.

"My father is a monster! How could he order to do this?" She cried, tears finally falling and mixing with the snow.

"P-please stop insulting the king-"

"Shut up!"

She turned around and faced me. She smiled sadly and her cheeks were faintly tinged with pink.

"I'm sorry for the injustice my father has caused. I promise you... I will change the world... For the better. I will end all the blood being shed on account of my father's selfishness... I promise." She said and turned around to leave.

"Wait! What is your name?" I asked.

The princess turned around and smiled, "Rin."

Then she began running until she was out of sight. The soldiers grumbled and left too, leaving me alive.

I reached touched the pendant around my neck with my blood stained hands and my eyes became hard and cold.

"I swear that I will avenge the death of my family and village! I will defeat the tyrant king!" I yelled into the burnt and destroyed village.

My father had then moved a bit and I realized he wasn't dead. My heart was filled with joy as I realized that I wasn't alone. I helped him up and he hobbled into the remains of our house. The snow had made the fire cease and only half of the house was really damaged.

"We cannot let their deaths go unpunished." My father said with tears in his eyes.

I nodded and in that moment, my heart got locked in a cage to which the key was at the bottom of a violent river.

(Flashback end)

That is where my new life began... The innocent ten year old Len had burned to ashes and from the ashes a new me had arisen: Len, the avenger.

The Princess had saved me. Months after the incident there was a rumor that she had been sent to another kingdom and that the new heir was her twin brother: Ren Kagane.

Though I couldn't remember very clearly, Rin resembled Ren in every way possible. They also seemed to have the same morals... I guess twins do have some sort connection after all. Now that I know Ren I wish I could see the princess to thank her properly for saving my life. I am an honorable man and due to that I owe her my life.

Somehow I began to lose consciousness and entered into deep pacifying sleep with only the face of the princess to accompany me.

* * *

><p><strong>Ren's P.O.V<strong>

I awoke and the dim sunlight infiltrated my room. Blinking slowly I yawned, stretched and finally got up from my bed.

There was a slight knock on my door.

"Who is it?." I asked in my deeper, Ren voice.

"It is me, Luka."

"You may come in." I said in my normal girl tone.

The door opened to reveal my pink haired handmaid walked in. Besides my father and a few trusted people of the court, Luka was the only one who knew my real identity.

"How is Princess Rin feeling today?"

"Luka," I sighed, "You know I don't like being called that."

"Fine, as you wish. How are you feeling Rin?"

"Same as always...trying to figure out who I am." I said as I took off my night shirt.

"Augh!"

I blinked rapidly. Did Luka just yell? She was always the calm and reserved one.

"Luka?" I inquired in a confused manner.

"I'm sorry to startle you Rin but it's just so unfair! Your father forced too much responsibility and pressure on you! He didn't get the boy he wanted but that doesn't mean he had the right to torture you mentally until he transformed you into what he wanted! It's not fair that a little girl would have to wield a sword at the age of ten and become hardened by both her father and the cruel world around her! It's just not fair!" She yelled and then began crying...Tears of lament for me.

My feminine side activated and I immediately wrapped my arms around her. When my man instincts kicked in I quickly ignored them. Rin needed some time out of her cage as well. Luka had seen me grow up... She knew what I had been through.

"Oh, I'm sorry my lady for crying in front of you."

I smiled and hugged her tighter, "You and I are only human. We don't have to be strong 100 percent of the time."

"O-okay... But who believes that Rin or Ren?"

I stood silent for a moment. I didn't expect that question.

"Both."

Luka nodded and she made me lift my arms. Slowly she began to wrap the bandages around my chest once more. When my chest had begun to developed it hurt a lot to have them bound, but after many years I got used to it and the pain diminished significantly.

She helped me dress into my uniform and then hooked my navy blue cape to it. She brushed my hair and I looked in the mirror.

"You're ready Prince Ren."

I nodded and without another word left the room, leaving my devoted maid behind.

"Ren!"

Luka ran out of the room and caught up to me.

"I forgot to tell you... There is a rumor of a soon to be invasion by the Kingdom of Red... We might soon be fighting."

"I see... Thank you for informing me Luka." I said in my deep voice.

"And also... Princess Rin may need to make an appearance."

My eyes widened. Rin hadn't appeared in over six years! Ren kicked in and I regained my calm composure.

"Thank you Luka. Now if you excuse me, I need to wake up my knights."

She nodded and left down the corridor. Luckily my Ren side hadn't given away any sign of weakness but my inner Rin was freaking out.

What am I going to do?

"Ren!"

I turned around and found my father coming towards me. He was a big man with a trimmed mustache and a beard. His blonde hair was combed back and his crown rested on his hand. I automatically frowned as he approached me. How I despised this man...

"Father, what do you want?" I asked in an irritated tone.

"I assume that you have heard about Red's eminent invasion."

"Yes, but can we talk later? I'm late to the training session."

"Alright. I'll meet you after practice."

I nodded and left the room as fast as I could.

I exited the castle and made my way towards the dorms. My men were already waiting outside in a perfect line formation. It has just been about two weeks and they are already getting the hang of it. Heh, should expect that from the Black Knights huh? The special elite forces of my father's regiments. The only ones I control and I only.

"Good morning men."

"Morning Prince Ren!"

"Today, we will have a more rigorous training session. It will start with a run around the castle grounds, sparring exercises, and we will use shields. Up to now we have practiced using shields as defense. Today we will learn various formations or battle tactics for both offense and defense."

They nodded though I could tell some dreaded the schedule... Too bad. If we are ever going to have a chance to fight in a real battle we have to take training seriously. Maybe... Just maybe... My father will let my regiment into the action during the invasion attempt. That will give me a chance to show him that I can lead men efficiently and I would make a good ruler.

"Okay, so everyone start at the dorm entrance!" I instructed.

"Yes, your highness!" They shouted and ran towards the dorm.

Len kind of strayed behind and studied me carefully, his cerulean eyes narrowing down.

I slightly blushed. There was no way he could...know...could he?

"What do you want Len?" I asked him.

"Nothing." He said and walked in line with the others.

I internally shrugged and then faced my troops. "START!"

They all took off at rapid speed, leaving behind dust that swirled around.

I saw them get out of sight and sighed. These guys don't know what they got themselves into...

Just then, the knights began to round up the corner and head back. In the lead as usual was Kaito, the athletic one. His blue hair ruffled wildy as he sprinted for all he was worth. Not far behind was Gakupo, who could run as fast as Kaito but preferred to take in the scenery. Behind him came the Knight of Royal Protection, Len.

Heh, the kid was smart. He didn't want to waste all of his energy on a mere run when he had loads of other stuff to do. That was very smart. I guess it was a good idea to make him the main knight... Person... Thing.

"I win!" Kaito exclaimed as he reached the finish line.

I looked at Gakupo and Len finish soon after. I looked after the blonde one... He's kind of cute...

THE HELL AM I SAY- THINKING? I AM A MANLY MAN OF MANLINESS NAMED REN! Damn you feminine body and hormones...

"Len! As a special member of the Black Knights you must pick up your pace!" I scolded, trying to make up for my earlier thoughts.

The boy scowled and looked me in the eye. "I was saving energy. I could easily beat Gakupo."

"Sure you can," I muttered, "But can you beat ME?"

Len raised an eyebrow, "You? The delicate prince is going to get dirty in a race?"

The boys around him murmured in surprise. Nobody could get away with insulting any person of the royal family. I normally would make the person eat their words and that is exactly what I plan to do with Len.

"Let's race."

"Okay, as you wish." He said and got ready.

"We'll stop at the tree over there. Kaito! Go over there to see who wins." I said as I unhooked my cape and handed it to Gakupo.

"Yes, your majesty!" He shouted and took off towards the tree.

Sure I could beat Len, but not Kaito.

"Go!"

We both took off at the same time. Slowly at first, but picking up the pace as the seconds passed.

I risked a look at Len who had his blue gaze focused on the finish line. I noticed his speed was greater than when he ran the other course, but then it remained at a steady rate. I, on the other hand, still had energy to burn. Taking longer strides, I ran ahead of Len. I saw him blink in surprise and then grin. Without another moment of hesitation he quickly caught up to me, almost stepping on my heels. I saw the tree and Kaito get nearer... Only a little more to go...

Just as soon as I was about to finish, Len lunged at the finish line and a cloud of smoke surrounded us.

I coughed and covered my eyes with my arm. Did I win?

As soon as the smoke cleared, we saw Kaito standing there with a shocked expression.

"Speak, Kaito. Who won?" I asked.

"I-It was a ...tie."

My eyes widened. A... TIE?

"G-Guess I'm not as bad a-as you thought... H-huh?" Len said amid heavy pants. He had truly tried his best and succeeded in tying with me. Despite being a girl I am faster than most boys due to the rigorous training my father put me through.

"Y-yeah..." I said and bent over to place my hands on my knees for I too had tried hard.

Len stood before me and offered me a hand, "Let's go continue training."

I reluctantly took his hand and nodded.

My father had trained me to rely on no one. He tried to strip me of my identity as a woman to become what he had always desired... A son to be the heir to the throne. According to him, women were useless in battle and could never match the strength of a man. For that reason I began to dress and act as a man and slowly secluded my true identity. By becoming a man I had the opportunity to show him he was wrong... Though I would be dressed as a man I would remain Rin Kagane, whether he liked it or not. But Rin didn't have the power to change her world... Only Ren did. That is why taking someone's hand for support was an alien action to me... I was taught to be self-sufficient.

"Woah! Did you see that? They were at par! Neither one could get ahead!" I heard the others murmur as we reached them.

I couldn't help but frown. I needed to get better. I couldn't let some guy come and beat me in a race. I couldn't care less about Kaito beating me, but something about this guy... Len Kagamine... He made me want to beat him in everything. He made a certain flame of competiveness spark within me. Was it because I felt I was at risk near him? If I were stripped of my title as a ruthless, victorious prince then what would happen to me? Would I have to go back to being Rin?

If I were stripped of my honor, pride, and strength as a knight and prince then I would be nothing...

I cannot allow that to happen...

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

We all lay sprawled out on the floor. We were almost done with today's practice. Sparring almost drained all of our energy. We still had those new battle formations to learn. I gazed at the shifting blue skies. I wish I could fly away... Like a bird, free of all burdens...

"Get up! What is this? Did you wimps get tired already? We are supposed to be the special forces, the Black Knights! If this is all you have then I'm better off facing an army by myself!" Prince Ren yelled as he walked over the resting knights.

"But we did so much today-"

"Shut up! If you can't go through a mere run and about ten sparring matches then how do you expect to last in war?" The blonde prince yelled, his blue eyes full of cold disappointment.

I frowned. Are we really that weak? No! How can I expect to avenge my people if I can't even pass a mere training seminar? I was immediately filled with self-loathing. I'm still weak and powerless!

I got up and wiped my brow with my sleeve. Time to get serious.

"What's next?" I asked, facing the small prince.

I saw his mouth twitch, hinting a smile, but I could've just imagined it. Ren turned around and handed me a plain practice shield.

"Let's start shield practice."

I nodded and took a strong hold of the leather strap behind the shield with my left hand. My right hand confidentally held my sword.

Seeing that I had gotten up, the rest of the knights followed my example. There were only ten of us, a very small group compared to the king's forces which contained more than one thousand men.

"Now that everyone is ready, let's begin."

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

"Ren!"

The prince looked up from where he was leaning. We had just finished shield formations and they weren't as hard to do as I thought. It might prove to be difficult when you try to make hundreds of troops do the same exact thing, but with ten it wasn't challenging at all. As the prince had stated, "There is only mere confusion in numbers. You have no idea as to when a comrade might stab you in the back. Large numbers are great for head on attack and defense. But to make an attack successful, you need to break the enemy forces swiftly and if possible from the inside out. A huge army isn't good with stealth. It is all about strength for them. We, the Black Knights, are the ones who don't fall into that category. We keep our numbers small so stealth and espionage missions are no problem. During battle while everyone is fighting, it is us who try to reach the other side's general, captain etc. The chance of victory depends on us. For that same reason, take practice and training seriously. We are the only hope of this kingdom."

When the prince finished saying that, my chest was filled with pride. When I wasn't busy training, I thought about my mission. In between that and Ren's taunts I had forgotten that even if he is our age, he is a great strategist and military leader. Every time he gave one of those small speeches, I was filled with awe. He had the power to spark the flame of inspiration with your heart. I actually pay close attention to his words. This is my chance to learn from someone more experienced than I am in regards to real battle and combat skills. If he took us into battle, I would have no doubt that we would win. I had only known Ren for a month and yet... I feel like... I don't know. I don't really know what these emotions within me are called... It's so frustrating.

I was shaken out of my trance as I heard the knights murmur and bow. I stayed there and looked at them. Kaito tried to send me a signal telling me to do the same but I stood there, not comprehending what was going on.

"Ehem... Young lad, do you not know that you must bow in the presence of your king?" A voice said from behind me.

I turned to face the demon himself accompanied with his attendant. The king gave me a harsh look and his attendant sneered.

"Bow down to your king!"

I growled. There was no way I was bowing to a "king" who had his hands tainted with the blood of many innocent souls. No way.

"I only take orders from Prince Ren." I said sternly and I heard everyone gasp, including Ren himself.

"Are you saying you won't bow down to your king? Is this an act of treason?" The attendant demanded angrily.

I looked over to Ren, standing on the sidelines. His cold eyes that rarely showed emotion were easy to read now. They showed pride. He slowly nodded his head, as if signaling that as much as it seemed unfair I must bow to the evil man.

"No, it isn't an act of treason. I swore to be loyal to this kingdom and loyal I shall be." I said as I bowed infront of the tyrant king.

"That is much better boy. Don't repeat your actions again." The attendant said with another sneer.

The king remained silent, probably too "high and pure" to be speaking to us. We might taint his golden crown... Oh no- Stupid hypocritical imbecile... I stared him down as he walked towards Ren... Your days are numbered.

The three walked away and I was filled with a strong emotion: hate. Hate filled my senses and if only I had a sword I would've ripped the king to pieces then and there. In a moment like this when I am consumed by rage even Ren might be in danger. He would protect his father and I would have to end up killing him in order to get to the bigger fish. I don't hate Ren... I actually think he is a great leader and I admire him... But if he tries to protect his father then I will have no other choice than to kill him too. Would he protect his father? Or would he turn his back to him? Ren is the only obstacle in my plan. If he opposes me, then overthrowing the king will be a lot harder. But if he sides with me... Who am I kidding? Why would he team up with a guy planning to kill his father? Sure, he may not like him but that doesn't mean he wishes he were dead.

We remained in silence. Small conversations sputtered among us, but no one got up.

After about twenty minutes, Kaito yawned, "I wonder where Prince Ren is?"

"Someone should go look for him." Gakupo put in.

"What and get in trouble with the king? I'm not crazy, but you can go." Kaito said.

"What? Me? My awesome fabulousness won't stop the king from yelling at me either!"

"Let Len go! He's the Prince's right handed man anyway!" Some other guy yelled.

I sighed and got up. No fighting back there since he was right. I should find Ren.

"Yeah okay I'll go." I muttered as I stood up.

"Yay! Len is our hero!" Kaito exclaimed, "Say Len... If you don't come back alive... Can I keep your stuff?"

I rolled my eyes, "I'm not going to die, idiot."

"Okay, if you say soooo~."

I sighed and walked away from the group of immature knights.

I walked towards the castle, maybe Ren went there. We had been training in the small arena outside the dorms. I made my way towards the bigger practice arena which contained many sparring dummies. Ren was nowhere in sight. Where could he be? I carefully neared the castle's garden which extended half a mile from the actual castle. Nope, no sign of the small blonde prince. As I was about to leave I heard voices come from the rose beds. I hunched over and peeked over a shrub to see who it was. It was the king talking to the gardener. If Ren isn't with the king, then where is he?

I quickly left before they found me. I went in the opposite direction of the garden, back to the dorms. But instead of taking a turn to get to the dorms, I went on a different path leading to the woods. I had almost circled the whole castle and Ren wasn't to be found. He could be in the castle but there is no way I'm going in there.

I heard the twigs and leaves crunch under my boots as I swiftly made my way through the woods. Then, I heard an unmistakable noise not too far away.

It was the sound of a sword slashing at wood and rock.

Slowly, I tried to locate the sound, my ears guiding my feet. I placed my hands against the tree bark and I titled my head to get a good view of the person. It's not that I was afraid of spying or of the person I might find, I am not in the mood to confront anyone that isn't Ren.

Ren stood among the trees, slashing at the bark with his sword. I stood there watching his movements that were well coordinated and could only be described as grace. His footing was light yet steady. His blue eyes were set and held anger inside them. His pale skin was glistening with sweat. His mouth was twisted upright in rage. The sword he wielded fell with a menacing arc upon the brown rugged bark. Whatever his father had told him must've made him extremely furious.

"How dare he say I'm not good enough? How dare he put down my knights?" He yelled and continued to take his anger out on the tree.

I was about to turn around and leave, but then remembered the other knights had sent me to fetch Ren.

Cautiously, I stepped forward, making my presence known.

Ren immediately tensed and pointed his sword in the direction of the intruder.

His hard gaze softened a bit when he saw me, "Oh it's you Len."

"Yeah. The knights were worried about your whereabouts."

"I see. Well I was about to head back anyway."

I should've turned around and left, but something made me hesitate.

"Pardon me, but why are you so angry?" I asked, actually using my manners which I rarely did. It was just something about his actions that warned me not to get him mad...

"The Kingdom of Red is planning to invade us. The Kingdom of Yellow will crumble if we are invaded. We are strong now, but we might have a tough time defeating them."

I stood there, shocked. Red is planning an invasion?

"I told my father to try to solve this in a diplomatic way. His selfish ways and radical statements are what got us into this mess so why should the people pay with their blood?" He said angrily as he stared at the floor.

I couldn't find any words to say. This was a really bad situation. Not just my village, but now the whole kingdom could be destroyed? And it was all thanks to the king... That monster!

"I told my father that we could help stop the invasion. We could travel to the land of Red and spy. I don't know! We could be helpful in some way!" He said and raised his hands in a helpless manner.

"He said there was no way a group of ten could be stronger than his army. There was no way I could build a strong regiment!" He spat and then looked at me, "Why am I even telling you this? It's supposed to be confidential and here I am telling a guy I have known for little over a month! Something is wrong with me."

Ren gave a small frustrated groan and placed his head in his hands, trying to sort everything out.

I couldn't believe it. Here in front of me is a guy who was supposed to be tough and ruthless. Yet, here he was telling my his secrets as if I were... Some kind of... Friend?

"Nothing is wrong. You care for your people. Is that so wrong? I bet you would make a better king than the one we have right now."

His sea blue eyes widened and he searched my face, looking for the trap hidden behind the compliment. I may be imagining things, but I think his cheeks became tinged with a rosy pink color.

I sighed and looked at Ren.

"If the war is eminent, then instead of worrying about the damages, let's prepare to stop them."

He nodded and his face grew serious.

"My father gave me a week to prepare my knights to see if we will be allowed to enter battle."

I nodded in response, "Well, then we will have to train harder."

"..."

"I swore to be loyal to you and I won't hesitate in risking my life for you." I said, at the moment Ren's face reminded me of Rin.

I gulped. I might as well be swearing loyalty to her and that is the least I could do after she saved my life so many years ago.

Ren sighed and for a moment his face flashed defeat, but just as quickly as it was shown it disappeared. Instead, his blue eyes were full determination.

"Let's go to war."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: LONG CHAPTER FTW~! xD hope you guys liked this chapter! Please review and tell me your opinion on this chapter~! It would mean a lot to me *~* …. **

**REVIEW RESPONSES: **

**Onlymecapde: Here you go ^~^**

**SoulsOfTeardrops: Hahahaha, yeah that would be funny xD thank you~!**

**Xitlalit123: You do? o.o … xD If you didn't (which I know you did) this chapter said so xD good job on guessing though~! Thanks for reviewing~!**

**Az-Sticker: Thank you~!**

**tinyTeto-chan: Was it really funny? *w* I actually thought it needed more humor xD Len, how do you not notice? xD Does he have a gay roomate? *looks at Kaito* hmmm… Kaito: I AM INNOCENT~!**

**Demi-d-Chookies: oh you changed your name! thank you for the review~!**

**Domo-chii: Thank you~! *hug***

**Miri-chan: YAY~! *pets plot bunnies* see? They like you ^~^ thanks~**

**MizukawaYuki: EXACTLY! *hands cookie for being awesome* bulls eye! I write those high school drama stories myself and this is a good way not to get fed up with them ^~^**

**Asianchibi99: *gives cookie* yes you do! Thank you, o loyal reviewer~!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Here is a new chapter :D in apology for taking so long, I made this chapter extra long: 9,000+ words ^u^ I is proud.**

**So please continue supporting this story as you have done until now… I would literally be nothing without you guys backing me up. I am seriously grateful to you all TT^TT**

**P.S: Many have been wondering if this story was based off Story of Evil… kinda. It's based off **_**Chivalry**_** and **_**Lost Destination**_** by Len Kagamine.**

**ENJOY AND PLEASE REVIEW~!**

* * *

><p><strong><strong>°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°<strong>**

**It Would Be Easier if I Could Hate You**

**Chapter 5: Pass or Fail, The Way of Life**

****°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°****

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

_"I promise you... I will change the world... For the better. I will end all the blood being shed on account of my father's selfishness... I promise."_

_"I swear that I will avenge the death of my family and village! I will defeat the tyrant king!" _

_"Not everything is blood and war." _

_"I swore to be loyal to you and I won't hesitate in risking my life for you."_

I woke up with a start. Cold sweat drops accumulated on my forehead. It had been a long time since I dreamt anything at all. Ren had drilled us until it hurt to breathe. Not that I blame him though, with an eminent war and an upcoming test who wouldn't do that?

I had to sit up to calm my whirring mind. So many conflicting thoughts... I swore two things. Two things that will not be able to be carried out unless one of the oaths is broken. I promised, with my mother's blood on my hands, that I would avenge my family's death... That goal still burns within my heart. The other oath I made a week ago...

_"I swore to be loyal to you and I won't hesitate in risking my life for you."_

Could I really do that? I mean, I'm planning to kill his father! No... They are two different oaths... While on the battlefield I shall be loyal to Ren until the death. But when the time comes... I shall sever all ties with the prince.

_"I promise you... I will change the world... For the better. I will end all the blood being shed on account of my father's selfishness... I promise."_

The princess's words floated into my mind once more. I sighed into the darkness of my room. She wanted the best for her kingdom and look at where she is now... In a far away kingdom in who knows where, unable to carry out the oath she made to me long ago. Her father sent away the only hope this kingdom had...

An image of Ren flashed in my mind. His cold sea blue eyes were always set strait, showing no emotion or weakness. His chin always held high with pride. I guess Ren could also become a good leader despite his bad reputation. The people wouldn't trust him until he gained their faith through hard labor.

Until I personally began to know him, I also thought of him as a cold, ruthless, evil prince. So different from the princess yet so alike...

I wonder if I'll ever be able to see her again. I need to thank her... She saved my life.

War... If we pass the King's inspection, we're going to head into war with Red unless we send a diplomatic party to form a treaty. Yet, knowing the King, a diplomatic solution isn't an option.

I looked at the clock: 12:19. I sighed and as silently as possible, got dressed and left the room. Ren would get infuriated if I didn't make it to our private practice session on time.

I trotted to the practice arena and found it empty. That's strange... The Prince hates unpunctuality.

I walked for a moment until I reached a small hill near the forest where I found Ren a week ago. And to my surprise, the prince lay on the hill, his eyes closed.

I didn't know whether to approach him and risk being sliced to pieces by the sword that lay next to him or stand there looking like a fool.

It was better to die than be a fool.

I slowly approached him, trying not to make a sound in case he was sleeping. His resting face looked so peaceful...no one would guess that this guy was a demon in battle, showing no mercy to his enemies.

Then, while I was gawking at his face, Ren's gloved hand reached for his sword and I didn't even see him take it out of its scabbard. In a flurry of motion, Ren tackled me and I fell back against the damp green grass. It all happened so fast it took me a while to realize what had happened. Ren was straddled on my waist, his sword raised, the tip resting against my throat. His left hand was holding my right arm down. His sea blue eyes were set with cold determination...ready to kill.

I refused to show fear even with the steel blade pressed against my throat. Ren's eyes widened and his fierce expression was wiped away, instead, his face showed nothing but confusion and surprise.

"Len?" He asked and then immediately removed his sword from my throat, his face a slight pinkish hue "I-I thought you were someone trying to attack me."

"It was my fault for sneaking up on you. I didn't want to disturb you but didn't know you were so alert." I said truthfully.

"I... I need to be alert since people hate me and my father and wouldn't doubt in killing me." He said with a sad tone before getting off me and sitting down, "I shouldn't be off guard even in my own castle."

I felt my heart stop. I was one of those people...

"Yes...I know." I muttered, not able to look him in the eye, then I remembered something, "But why was Your Highness resting here?"

"I..." He started and looked away, "I was reflecting on what's to come."

"About the war?"

He nodded, his face covered by his golden hair.

"You're worried about the war? But you've been I wars before! How could you be afraid?" I exclaimed in disbelief.

"I'm not afraid of war! I've been in more battles than you've ever seen! I'm worried about my father's reaction later today! Red is a very powerful enemy! We could lose if not all our troops are out there!" He spat angrily, " My people! I am not going to let innocent people die like..."

Ren grew silent and buried his face in his knees. Whatever he had been remembering must've been pretty harsh to make a stoic guy like him hide his face.

That's when I finally made up my mind. Ren isn't a bad guy after all. He's actually really caring towards his subjects. His tough actions were the only way to protect them. If not by brute force how else does one protect an entire nation? It made perfect sense.

"I'm a failure... My heart is clouded with fear and hate all at once. Fear for them... Hate for wars and death." Ren whispered, "A man who fears...has a weak resolve and a trembling hand, unable to change his destiny or others."

I remained silent, something within me advising me to stay quiet.

Ren took his sword and stared at his reflection then, he slowly took off the glove that covered his left hand.

"People think of me as a heartless monster. Maybe it would be better if it were that way... If I were like my father I wouldn't be like this right now..."

I've heard that after so much pressure, people crack. Put pressure, sleep depivation, having to teach us, and support an evil father all together... To me, that's pretty tough. Even I, who am pretty proud of my strength and determination, don't think I would be able to do that. Maybe that was what the prince was going through right now... Or maybe he needed someone to tell these things to... Someone like me.

"Royalty... Such a stupid thing," Ren said and stared at his left hand before running his index finger across the length of his sword, pearls of blood falling from the tip.

He studied his now bloodied finger, "Pain... Suffering... What's so special about my blood anyway? It's the same as yours! I bet you would make a better prince than me."

"STOP!" I shouted, unable to hear anymore.

Ren looked up at me in a shocked manner.

"Who are you? Ren wouldn't be saying stupid things like this! Yes, people suffer and yes, wars are horrible things that leave a nation scarred but that's what you're here for! I don't have the courage and dedication you do! To have seen so many tragic things in life... I couldn't do that and be strong willed! You can change all that! A prince is is meant to lead his people and carry their burdens... Share their hope... When they fear or despair, shed light upon them! The Prince I knew did all that and more! For that I began to admire you, damn it! I wish I could be you!"

Ren looked up at me, his eyes wide with surprise and shock. I myself was surprised at my outburst.

"Many wouldn't dare speak to me in that manner but you..." He said and grabbed the hilt of his sword.

I slightly flinched. Maybe I had gone too far? Well I wasn't going to apologize.

"You have guts to speak to me in that manner... And for that I admire you." Ren said and sheathed his sword, "No one would yell at me even if it were for my own good. They bend towards power and cower in fear. I'm glad that's not your case. Thanks to you I regained my senses. I apologize for my moment of weakness."

I felt this weird emotion within my chest but I couldn't identify what it was. Then I realized something... I had been nice again. As Ren got up and offered me his hand to get up I realized he was also being...nice. It's going to take some time to get used to saying that four letter word. It's funny though... He's offering me his hand but looking the opposite way. It's almost as if he refuses to admit to this nice deed he's performing. If he begins to act nice then he'll slowly lose his ruthless image, won't he? I think that's why he isn't this way to the other soldiers. He needs to retain power in order to... change his world.

I reluctantly took his now gloved hand and stood besides him.

Our hands were still gripped tightly and my cerulean gaze met his sea blue eyes, "You don't have to apologize... You're only human. Humans have emotions...no matter how hard they try to erase them."

His face showed a bit of surprise but immediately covered it up with a nod of understanding. Our eyes met once more and in that moment we had a mutual understanding. We both knew we were trying to do just that... Erase our emotions. I just saw the prince, a guy who rarely showed emotion, break down in front of me. Even I yelled out a whole mess of things that had been kept deep within my heart. To top it off we were being nice to each other! It's almost as if...as if around each other we let our guard down and show what little emotion we have. We are so alike, Ren and I...

I looked away and removed my hand from Ren's as a very strange thought formed in my mind. One, we were two guys holding hands...and that's very weird. Two, even if I might try to deny it Ren and I were beginning to get along from time to time...as if we were becoming f-friends. Gah! That word is even worse than nice! I can't have any friends! I'm an avenger! Friends will simply get in the way! No, Ren and I are...acquaintances! Yeah! I am simply a trusted soldier and I respect my leader... Yeah, that's it. Simply that. Ren and I could never be...friends.

"It's getting late! We must go practice!" Ren exclaimed and walked towards the arena, mumbling under his breath.

We'll he's back to normal.

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

"Y-You've gotten better!" Ren praised through labored breaths.

"You too, Prince Ren." I said and wiped the sweat off my forehead.

He glared at me and rolled his eyes. I forget that he is uncomfortable with me calling him that.

"Ren... Tell me the truth," I said and looked at my blade, "If war comes... Will we be ready?"

Ren looked down at the floor, "What do you think?"

"Well-"

"Of course we'll be ready! Do you think all this hard training is normal? My father's soldiers train less than we do!" He spoke proudly, "Now go back to bed. We're ending this early. You need to be well rested for later today. And tell Kaito not to burn all his energy in the run this time... Tell him to save it for the test."

I nodded and he turned around to leave.

I hesitated before speaking, "Ren."

The golden haired prince turned around to face me, waiting for me to speak.

"Don't worry about failing your father's inspection. With you training us there is no we we can't be ready... Y-you're," I said and silently cursed for stuttering, "You're a great leader and prince."

He remained silent and began walking away, "Let's hope so... Thank you."

I watched the him walk away, and then returned to my dorm room. I entered as quietly as I could only to find Kaito sitting at the window, looking outside.

"Ah, you're back." Kaito mused as he turned to face me.

"Since when did you wake up?" I asked, hoping he wouldn't notice I had my sword.

"Since you left. I can't sleep." He confessed, "I'm nervous about later today."

"The king's test?" I asked as I slowly put my sword back to where it always is.

Kaito's eyes followed it but he said nothing in regards to it, "Yeah, aren't you?"

"A little I guess but we have to keep faith in Ren. He has shed every drop of blood and sweat we have alongside us."

Kaito nodded, "Still... If we pass, we're going to enter the world of war."

"I know," I said and sat down next to him, "Instead of dreading it, think of it as the power to protect our loved ones... Our kingdom and every living thing in it."

My blue-haired companion smiled, "That's a great way to think about it. Y'know something Len?"

"What?" I asked as I took my jacket off.

"You're a great guy. I'm glad you're my roommate. Gakupo would probably try to style my hair every night. It's nice having someone to talk to when you're feeling uneasy." Kaito said thoughtfully and then grinned, "I'm glad to have a friend like you!"

My eyes widened in surprise. I had not been expecting that at all.

"U-um, thank you," I said, not sure how to reply, "I'm glad as well."

"Hehehe..." Kaito said and grew silent, "The prince... I want to see him in battle. The way he fights and everything make him seem like a cold villain but I don't think he's that bad."

"Yeah..."

"Heh! He's so pretty our enemies will be surprised when he starts cutting their numbers in half!" Kaito said with a laugh.

"He's something alright..." I said unconsciously.

"Yep! Though you won't be far behind. I mean, no offense but you're face is prettier than mine."

"Ren's is more feminine than mine!" I exclaimed before it was too late to take it back.

Kaito smirked, "So you admit to the crime."

My eyes widened in disbelief, "I-I don't think about the prince that way!"

"Suree~" he taunted.

"You're the one who mentions his looks all the time so aren't you the one who thinks of him like that?" I questioned him.

"H-huh? No! It's not like that!"

"Hah! See my position now?"

"Weren't you with him before you came in here?" Kaito asked.

"Wha-? G-go to sleep!" I said and took off the band that kept my hair tied together.

"Okay- gah! You have to stop doing that! You look like Ren's twin!"

"S-sorry." I mumbled and ducked under the covers, "Rest for later today."

"'Kay Len. Goodnight."

He soon went quiet and all that could be heard was Kaito's even breathing.

I closed my eyes and thought about the side of Ren I had seen today. If it came down to it...

Could I really kill him?

* * *

><p><strong>Ren's P.O.V<strong>

I tossed and turned in bed, trying to find an impossible sleep.

Today... I will finally be able to prove my father wrong.

I had always been put down by my father. Since I have memory, my father has treated me like worthless dirt.

When I was very young, I remember that my father used to yell at my mother frequently for not bearing a son and instead having me.

He even hit her once.

_I had been playing with a doll. My father entered and snatched it away from me, "This is a waste of time! A boy would've already been learning the basics of combat!"_

_My sweet caring mother came to my rescue, "She's a little girl! She's not male so stop comparing her to one! Any five year old girl plays with dolls. "_

_"Why did you have to bear a woman? Have you ever heard of a woman heir?" He exclaimed_

_"She is still our child!" She exclaimed, "You can't deny that!"_

_"She must be YOU'RE child! My child would never be so weak!"_

_"Shut up! You dare speak to me that way?"_

_"Any man who denies his daughter is not a man at all!"_

_SLAP!_

_My eyes widened as I saw my mother's body recoil backwards and then I eyed my father's raised hand._

_He turned to me, "What are you looking at?"_

_I squeaked and ran away, crying with everything I had. Luka, the new teenage maid, consoled me through the night._

A year later, he sent my mother away on a "diplomatic mission" to a distant country and it wasn't until much later that I realized he just wanted to get rid of her. Her carriage was attacked by bandits and she was killed. The only person who truly loved me had died...leaving me all alone besides a cruel father who wished I was dead.

When I was seven, my father gave me the lecture of my life. Those words that made me full of self-loathing and dismay...

_"Your Majesty, the people have been rumoring that the kingdom will loosen with a woman heir. Many are overjoyed but others are furious."_

_"A woman heir... Preposterous!"_

_I had been quiet all this time but couldn't be silent anymore, "I can be a good queen!"_

_The king burst into laughter, "Don't make me laugh! You wouldn't know the basics of war! You wouldn't know military strategies! How do you expect to rule?"_

_"I-I could learn."_

_"A woman..learning about war?" He yelled and turned to a man, "Tell your son to come in here."_

_He nodded and soon, a boy a little older than me came in. He had teal hair and bright eyes._

_"What's your name?"_

_"M-mikuo, Your Majesty."_

_"Alright Mikuo," my father said, "I order you to fight with my daughter."_

_"B-but the princess is a g-"_

_"Do it!" He snarled, "Are you refusing a king's order?"_

_"N-no sir."_

_Mikuo looked at me with an apologetic look. I nodded to assure him it was alright._

_I managed to dodge his first swipe but in less than a minute I was on the floor._

_"See what I mean?" My father taunted, "You'll never be as strong as a man."_

_Mikuo helped me stand up. My father then ordered him and everybody else in the room to leave._

_I cringed as the door closed._

_"Mikuo... He's the son of a well ranked soldier. He's going to begin his knight's training next year. Yet, his father began training him a year ago. That is what a future ruler must do!" He said and then looked at me, "You on the other hand... All you do is cry about your mother's death! You are weak and useless! Your presence means nothing to this castle and nothing to the kingdom! You're a simple burden! A woman can never achieve the throne! You're too soft on people! You can't even defend yourself! You are a worthless human being and will never be more than a weak woman! Always remember this: You are worth nothing!_

_He began to walk away and I spoke despite the stinging tears, "Would you like it if I were a man?"_

_He rolled his eyes, "That's a stupid question. Of course! Now get out of my sight!"_

_I took a deep breath and ran past him, making sure to bump into a pricey vase on the way. I ignored Luka calling me and locked myself in the safety of my room. _

_With vision blurred by tears, I threw everything off my bed. I destroyed everything I could. I stared at my reflection... Am I truly worthless?_

_I slowly sank to my knees and rocked back and forth, holding my mother's picture close to me. Maybe he was right... I was better off dead. I reached for a piece of broken pottery and fingered the sharp edge. I pulled back the sleeve of my dress to reveal my pale wrist._

_All it would take would be..._

_"Lady Rin!" Luka exclaimed as she barged in through the door and she shrieked when she saw me holding the piece of glass against my wrist._

_She immediately took it away and pulled me into a hug. In that moment I began to cry without holding back and I realized Luka had also begun to weep with me._

_"Don't you ever try to do that again!"_

_"I would be better off dead... I wouldn't be a burden anymore." I mumbled._

_"Don't say that! You are very special! Your existence brought light into many of our lives... Your mother would be truly saddened to see you acting this way... Just keep that in mind."_

_I nodded, "I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking."_

_"Now let's get you ready for dinner."_

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

_After dinner, I snuck out of my room and went to the kitchen where Mikuo had been sent for cleaning duty._

_I poked my head inside the kitchen and found Mikuo washing dishes._

_"Psssst."_

_He looked back and saw me. A kitchen maid also turned back and I hid._

_"Um, Miss Haku, am I done for the night?"_

_"Yes, you are free to go."_

_I was curled up into a ball, worried Haku might find me when I felt someone poke me._

_I looked up to see Mikuo, standing there, poking me with a stick._

_"You called me, Princess?"_

_I nodded frantically._

_"What for?"_

_"C-can you..."_

_"Can I what?"_

_"Teach me how to use a sword?"_

_His teal eyes widened with surprise and he began laughing. I glared at him, not liking that he too thought I was useless._

_Mikuo's laughter died down and he stared at me, "You're being serious aren't you?"_

_I gave him a look that told him I wasn't playing around._

_"Why do you want to learn?"_

_"My father says a ruler must know how to fight so I plan to learn just that."_

_"But you're a girl."_

_"And?" I asked, daring him to continue._

_"N-nothing." He said and sighed, "Alright, I'll teach you."_

_"Yay!"_

_"B-but I won't go easy on you because you're a g-girl... Or a princess."_

_I smiled, "of course not! Please teach me everything you know!"_

For two years Mikuo taught me how to handle a sword. We had as many practices as time would allow. Sometimes we met before dawn and others we met after dinner. Luka would help me by placing powder over any bruises I managed to get on my face or arms so that my father wouldn't suspect anything. I was a fast learner... Mikuo said so. He agreed that I would make a good leader as well. Too bad my father thought differently. My teal friend had begun his knights training and taught me everything he was shown.

My father received news that a certain village was planning a revolt. He said he would take care of it personally.

_"Father... I beg to come along."_

_"What will you do? You'll just get in the way!" _

_"I promise I won't."_

_He thought about it for a moment, "Fine... It might do you well to see a battle up close."_

_"Thank you."_

_My father didn't reply and I simply followed him. Though I was wearing a dress, I could feel the hilt of my sword strapped to my thigh._

_Time to see what I could do for my people._

_"Rin, stay near the carriage at all times." My father warned._

_"Yes sir!" I said but as soon as he left, I sneaked past my father's guards and left the carriage._

_The case didn't seem so bad... I mean, the streets were empty. I guess the revolt had died down..._

_I wandered another few snow covered streets, looking at the deserted homes._

_Then, I witnessed the horrible truth..._

_The pure white snow was dyed crimson red... People law strewn on the ground, their eyes forever closed._

_I fought back a scream that clawed at my throat. As I went further into the village, I began to notice that the houses were burnt, others destroyed completely._

_"GAHHHHH!"_

_I jumped at the sudden scream. It was a yell full of dispair... I ran in the direction the scream had come from, my heart pounding at the thought of a new victim. As I ran I lifted my dress and extracted the sword from its hiding place. _

_Maybe... Just maybe I would be of some use for once. _

_A boy was kneeling on the floor, his eyes closed and his hands dirty with blood. One of my father's men raised a sword and was about to strike him..._

_I ran with all my might and got in between the boy and the knight. I kept my footing steady and held the sword out to block his blow. I was slightly shaken by the force of his falling sword but my hold remained firm. _

_"What is the meaning of this?" I exclaimed, demanding an answer._

_"Your Majesty! What is the princess doing straying away from the general?" The soldier inquired._

_"I told you not to call me that repulsive name!" I spat. Ever since that day when my father spoke to me after my fight with Mikuo I had refused to answer to the name "princess." Princess is merely a title meant to oppress me!_

_"Y-yes, your Majesty." The soldier mumbled._

_"Sheath your weapons!" I cried and they obeyed._

_I turned to face the boy behind me who was looking at me with cerulean eyes that reflected nothing but surprise and shock. He had his golden hair tied back, leaving only a couple strands to shape his face. _

_"Are you okay?" I asked him._

_"Y-yes. Thank you." He muttered, probably still surprised that I had saved him. Now that I think about it, the boy was strikingly similar to Len._

_"Were you intending to kill him?" I yelled and looked at the various bodies that covered the ground. A woman a man, two children, "Did you two kill this family?"_

_"P-princess, it was on orders of the King-" the soldiers stuttered, not knowing what to make of my accusations._

_"He never said he would completely obliterate the village! He said he would stop a rebellion but from what I see this is a massacre!" I raged, my insides shaking with hate and lament._

_"We had orders-"_

_"Even the innocent children?" I asked, blinking back tears as I saw the tiny bodies of what were probably this boy's siblings._

_"My father is a monster! How could he order to do this?" I cried, not able to hold back anymore. My salty tears ran down my cheeks and onto the snow._

_"You're too soft on people."_

_No... This isn't being soft. It's called having a heart! And that's something my father didn't have..._

_"P-please stop insulting the king-"_

_"Shut up!" I screamed, not knowing how to kill the pain that was crushing my heart._

_I turned around and faced the poor boy. I smiled sadly and felt my cheeks slightly heat up._

_"I'm sorry for the injustice my father has caused. I promise you... I will change the world... For the better. I will end all the blood being shed on account of my father's selfishness... I promise." I swore and turned around to leave._

_"Wait! What is your name?"_

_I stopped walking and turned around as I smiled, "Rin."_

_Then, without asking for his name, I ran away. Tears blinded me but my heart was slightly lightened... I'm glad I could save someone._

_I snuck back into the carriage and wiped away the tears... It would take a man to rule this country, eh? Then a man is what it'll get..._

_My father ignored my presence as if I wasn't there and I couldn't believe how calm he was after having caused so many deaths._

_When we got home, my father went to his study and I went to my room where Luka went to meet me._

_"How was the trip, milady?"_

_"It was horrible... Did you know my father killed innocent people without any remorse?" I asked._

_She hung her head, silently admitting to the knowledge._

_"Oh." I said and then asked what I really wanted, "Luka... As the only heir I want what's best for my people."_

_She smiled, "Yes, I know you do."_

_"Call the tailor... I need new clothes."_

_"But you have many beautiful dresses-"_

_"I-I need to dress like a man... Like Mikuo!"_

_"But Rin, why-"_

_"So I can be the male heir my father has wanted so much! I can't help my people if I remain a woman! He wants a man he'll get a man!" I said, "It is the only way I can keep an oath I made."_

_"But-"_

_"For the first time I'll use my royal influence if necessary... Luka, it's an order! Call the tailor!"_

_She nodded and rushed out of the room. I felt kind of bad for yelling at a woman who had just been trying to help me all along._

_The tailor soon arrived and took my measurements but not before swearing not to tell anyone. After saying it was urgent, he assured me it would be ready by the next day._

_Luka gave me a disapproving look but I ignored her. As soon as the tailor left, she spoke._

_"Just because you might end up looking like a boy doesn't mean you'll be able to pass off as one! You don't even know how to handle a sword!"_

_I smiled, "I'd been hoping you'd say that."_

_She gave me a confused look, "Huh?"_

_I reached behind my bed's headboard and took out the sword Mikuo had given me._

_Luka gasped, "L-Lady Rin! Put that down or you could get hurt!"_

_"Luka, it's inside it's scabbard. We can't get hurt if it's covered!" I said._

_"Who gave you that?"_

_"Promise you won't tell?"_

_She nodded._

_"Mikuo has been giving me lessons and gave me this to use."_

_She sighed, "If you're so set on it... As you're newly appointed lady in waiting I shall support you on your decision."_

_"Thank you Luka."_

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

_I looked at my reflection in the mirror, from head to toe. I removed the clips from my hair and it fell on the sides. I was wearing a prince's attire. It consisted of a navy blue jacket with golden clasps, matching pants, boots of the finest leather, and a golden cape. In all... I looked like a young boy. Sure, slightly more feminine than most but easily passed off as male._

_The door slowly opened and Luka peeked in, "The hallway is clear. Your father is in his study."_

_I nodded and walked down the hallway until I reached the dreaded room. Well here goes nothing..._

_I knocked twice. _

_"Come in!" My father called out._

_I took a deep breath and turned the door knob, my heart beat accelerating with every step I took. I entered._

_His eyes widened when he saw me, "R-Rin? What is this foolishness?"_

_"I'm not Rin." I said with a lowered tone, "That is what I used to be."_

_"What are you playing at?"_

_"I've become the heir you wanted! You wanted a man," I said and pounded my chest, "Well here I am!"_

_"You don't even know how to use a sword and you expect me to name you heir?"_

_I pulled out the sword that was at my side, "I've been taking lessons from a friend."_

_"You'll never be as strong as a man!"_

_"If you train me I'm sure I could be!l become the knight you always wanted for a son!" I exclaimed, "Call a knight and tell him to fight me!"_

_In a matter of minutes an unknown knight showed up._

_"You called, your Majesty?"_

_"I want you to evaluate this...boy and tell me if he is at a knight's apprentice level."_

_"Princess Rin?"_

_"No," I said in a lower tone, "I am Ren Kagane, Rin's twin brother."_

_The look of surprise was very clear on his face. Though he would love to know more he wouldn't dare pry in the king's matters._

_He took his sword out and I did as well. He swung and I easily blocked his swipe. Using my small body to an advantage, I turned around quickly, switching my sword to my left hand and blocking yet another hit. Then, I rolled in between his legs and before he could react, pressed the edge of my sword onto my back. He let his sword clatter on the floor in sign of defeat._

_"He's surprisingly good."_

_I smirked as I saw my father give me a shocked look, "So?"_

_"I'd say he's at least on a three year knight's apprentice level."_

_"Alright you're dismissed!"_

_The knight bowed and left._

_"Will you train me now?"_

_He tightened his fists. He did not like to lose an argument._

_"I'll let you become a knight but only to prove that it is too much work for a woman... I'll train you MY way. There will be no going back."_

_I nodded, "I understand that perfectly."_

_"Alright Ren, let's hope this isn't one of your stupid ideas."_

_"Oh it won't be..."_

The next day, a public announcement was made. Princess Rin had been sent to another kingdom for diplomatic issues and to learn lady-like manners. Basically she was sent to boarding school.

I remember how my father had taken me to the balcony in order to introduce me.

_"It is with great joy that I present to you my son, Ren Kagane, the rightful heir to the throne. Ren had been sickly and for fear of his death we never revealed his existence. Yet, these past years he has been strengthening and is sick no more! He will lead this country after I cannot!"_

_The crowd murmured as I appeared besides my father, an exact replica of Rin. Then, without warning the crowd erupted into cheers._

_I simply stood there, proud that I was making the right decision._

The years that followed were some of the hardest of my life. I joined the knights training and got creamed on the first day. For starters, Mikuo hated my guts. He thought that it was my fault they had sent Rin away and it would've been better if she were here instead.

"She was the kindest person in the world! You're a heartless bastard like your father!" Mikuo yelled at me the first chance he got. Though he tried to hide it, I could see tears forming in the corner of his eyes. It hurt me to see him upset like that but I decided that it was for the best that he not know who I truly was.

Every time we got paired up together, Mikuo made sure to go as hard on me as possible. His strikes were fueled by hate and many times I ended with a cut lip or other bruises. Now, I thank him for that because I learned on a higher level than the rest did. When I failed a match, my father made sure to punish me. Sometimes he didn't give me food or other times I had to clean the stalls etcetera.

As years went by, my skills only increased and soon, I was past the skills of many of the knights. Due to this, I was sent into many battles frequently. I always returned victorious. My heart slowly began to harden and lost its warmness. I began to fight with an iron fist, showing no mercy to anyone who dared oppose me. I locked away everything hat weakened me, all my emotions... Everything. I locked Rin away somewhere so she wouldn't interfere with my plan. Ren is worth everything Rin wasn't.

Yet, I still had my father's disapproval. Even after forming the Black Knights he still thought I was always "not good enough".

I stared at my hand that had begun to tremble in the darkness. No, I wasn't scared... I was shaking in anticipation. How I will savor making him eat his words… I showed him I had strength but now I'll show him I could be a successful leader as well.

He'll regret ever making me feel like dirt...

Then I remembered something... If we go into war, Luka told me Rin would have to make an appearance.

I must try not to run into Mikuo or he'll surely figure out Ren and I are the same person!

If that happens... Everything will fall apart.

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

We woke to the sound of the clanging breakfast bell. Kaito nearly tripped while getting dressed. Once we were done we ran downstairs and it seemed like all of us awoke at the same time for Gakupo and his roommate as well as others also rushed to the table.

Ren met us there in about five minutes, "Good-morning knights."

"Good-morning."

"Today is the day we've been waiting for! Whatever the test we shall finish and excel!" Ren yelled.

"Yes!" We all yelled with enthusiasm.

As soon as we finished eating, the King showed up with ten other knights.

"Ren, are your men ready for the test?"

He nodded vigorously and told us to follow him outside.

One of the knights stood while the others sat down, "We will conduct a three part test."

"Part one, you must send three runners plus the leader and one by one we shall conduct races. Part two, one on one sword matches and finally a semi-replica of battle between the two teams. Is that okay with you, Prince Ren?"

Ren nodded dismissively.

"Then let's begin!"

Ren gathered us, "Okay so as the leader I'll run, Gakupo, Len and especially Kaito... You'll be my runners."

We all nodded, "We won't let you down."

"I trust you."

"Well?" One of the soldiers called, "you ready?"

"Yeah. Who's your leader?" Ren asked and went forth, "Let's race first."

Someone emerged from behind them, "I'm the leader Prince _Ren_."

I noticed Ren tensed and was slightly surprised as he saw the guy. Hm, did he know him?

The guy had teal hair and matching eyes. He was taller than Ren and his eyes narrowed as he saw the prince.

"Mikuo..." Ren hissed under his breath.

"So are we gonna race or what, Ren?"

A smirk spread itself across Ren's face, "Of course."

"Ready!"

"Set!"

"Go!"

Ren and Mikuo took off running at full speed. Though from our last race I knew it wasn't Ren's full speed...

I looked as Ren's determined face kept the finish line in sight. I couldn't help my racing heart as Mikuo began to gain on Ren and even begin to get ahead. I-I mean I would rather Ren win than that teal stranger. I also knew this was very important to him and he wouldn't bear losing.

Then, as expected Ren exerted his extra energy giving him a boost in speed right before crossing the finish line... A few inches before Mikuo.

Our group burst into cheer, "YEAH!"

Ren walked back to his, his face pink from the run, "T-thanks, who's next?"

Kaito raised his hand, "Meee~! I wanna go!"

Ren nodded, "Go ahead."

Mikuo chose another soldier to race, "Go!"

I resisted the urge to laugh, this Mikuo person is very mad. He muttered something to the man and the latter nodded. Mikuo was probably threatening him to win. I sighed, I feel sorry for that guy... No one beats Kaito.

"Ready, Set, Go!"

Kaito took off so fast that he whipped up a cloud of dust. When it cleared, I saw Kaito standing triumphantly at the finish line and Mikuo glaring at his runner.

The next race also ended in our victory since Gakupo didn't worry about getting his clothes dirty.

I took a deep breath as my turn came around. Though I had tied with the prince I still feared failing him... No, I have to believe I can do it.

Ren gave me a look. I nodded and walked over to the starting line.

"Ready... Set... Go!"

I began to take off and saved some of my energy. Yet, the guy was going all out and soon was ahead of me, the finish line nearing very quickly.

I closed my eyes...

_"I swear that I will avenge the death of my family and village! I will defeat the tyrant king!"_

WHAT KIND OF AN AVENGER AM I IF I CAN'T WIN A DAMN RACE?

My eyes flashed open and I gained speed that I didn't know I was capable of.

Almost tripping, I finished the race... Winning.

"Alright," Mikuo sneered, "You passed this part.'

I still didn't understand why he and the prince seemed to hate each other...

"Good job Len!" Ren complimented, he was able to make comments like that with more ease now a days.

"SECOND PART!"

One by one, pairs fought against each other... The two teams were equally matched by the end of the first six matches the score was:

Mikuo- 4

Ren- 2

"Next pair!"

Ren gathered us together, "Okay so who wants to go next?"

Gakupo raised his hand, "I'll go."

Ren nodded and clapped him on the back. Mikuo also sent one of his soldiers to the arena.

"Fight!"

Gakupo may appear to many as a narcissist idiot but it was at times like this when he showed his true merit. In five minutes, Gakupo stood slightly sweating against his defeated opponent.

Mikuo- 4 / Ren- 3

"Next!"

I was about to stand but Kaito got up before me and placed his hand on my chest, pushing me back softly, "Save the best for last, eh?"

I couldn't help the smile that threatened to appear across my face, "Okay."

Kaito went up to the arena and though at times seemed at a loss, ended victorious. Mikuo looked like his head was going to blow up if he didn't start winning soon... Too bad because the only two people left are Ren and I. Unfortunately for him, neither of us were willing to lose.

Mikuo- 4/ Ren- 5

"Next!"

"Go Len!" Kaito cheered and Ren gave me an encouraging nod.

I returned it and walked towards the arena, unsheathing my sword.

My opponent was the same guy I raced, probably looking for a rematch. He smirked and our swords faced each other

"Begin!"

We launched at each other, our swords clashing against each other. I easily blocked his attacks as he did mine. Yet, somehow, he managed to press his sword against mine until I had no other choice but try to stay firm. He placed more weight on the sword and I felt my feet start sliding back.

I was losing ground.

Then, a sudden thought and sensation popped in my head. This was like deja vu... Except last time I had been the one doing the pushing and Ren was the one who had been running out of space... I remember he did a very interesting move...

Well, I am running out of options...

I switched my footing and flicked my wrist to apply more weight to my sword. Then, when the tip of my sword was slightly under his, I once again flicked my wrist and his blade clattered on the floor. His eyes darted from his sword to me, not believing what he had just seen.

I sighed in relief and felt like falling to my knees in exauhstion. Kaito came and helped me walk back to the others. As Ren walked up to the arena and passed me, he gave me a bewildered look. I merely shrugged.

Mikuo-4

Ren-6

Ren unsheathed his sword, the silver metal glinting in the sun. His sea-blue eyes weren't emotionless as usual. They were constantly shifting. He seemed... Troubled?

Ren's fingers opened and closed around the hilt of his sword as Mikuo reached him. I swear I saw Ren take a deep breath before looking Mikuo in the eye.

"Begin!"

Mikuo immediately rushed towards Ren, swinging his sword high above his head and then bringing it crushingly down. Ren barely had enough time to side-step, and he turned around just in time to block Mikuo's second strike.

I was staring at the intense fight. I had never seen Ren fight before...well not like this. During the entrance matches for the Black Knights I saw him fight the others but it was nothing compared to this one. My eyes could barely move fast enough to register their movements. Ren's red cape danced around like a flame that enveloped his body as he gracefully moved from one place to another. Using one hand, Ren unhooked one side of his cape and then the other before throwing it to our side. Kaito went and grabbed the cape all while not removing his royal blue eyes from the two knights engaged in battle.

"G-give up Ren! I'm better than you!" Mikuo exclaimed while swinging violently, aiming to hurt Ren for real.

"Y-you aren't! Do you forget who excelled during training?" Ren yelled back, wiping the gleaming perspiration from his forehead.

Mikuo sneered and attacked him again.

Ren rolled away on his back from his attack, "It's not my fault Mikuo!"

"Shut up!" Mikuo spat and once again aimed at Ren's head.

Ren quickly ducked and avoiding the hit. Then, he bent backwards as the teal guy's sword cut through air and before Mikuo could do anything, he was sent backwards by a kick to the gut provided by the prince.

Ren quickly ran and tried to pin him down with the sword but Mikuo blocked his strike while slowly rising up.

I couldn't believe it. This fight had easily gone past the ten minutes.

They twirled as they tried to hurt one another, neither having any success. They were both visibly tired but I knew neither Ren nor Mikuo would give up.

Mikwo walked to one extreme of the arena and Ren walked to the other.

"Admit it was your fault!" He said and ran towards Ren.

"I won't because it isn't my fault! Why can't you understand?" Ren exclaimed and also dashed towards Mikuo.

The sound of metal clashing made everyone jumped and nearly everyone gasped as they saw the ending result.

Mikuo was holding his sword against Ren's throat. I was about to sigh out in disappointment when I noticed where Ren's sword was... It was pressed lightly against Mikuo's side.

They had tied.

I couldn't believe it. I managed to fight on par with Ren but if it had been a long dragged out battle like this I would've lost.

"Tie!"

Mikuo gave a frustrated groan and retreated among his men.

Ren walked over to us slowly, visibly wearied out.

"You did great!"

"That was awesome!"

Ren nodded and I brought him a cup of water which he gulped down in less than a minute.

"Get ready... The hardest test begins now." He warned.

We nodded but I was worried. Ren looked pretty tired... Will he still be able to fight?

"FINAL EXAM... COMMENCE!"

Ren passed out the shields to us and Mikuo did the same.

We formed a shape similar to the Greek phlanax formation.

Mikuo's formation was different... But I couldn't see what it was.

"COMMENCE!"

"Charge!" Mikuo cried and his men advanced.

"Attack!" Ren answered.

Our forces met with a clash of metal. If you got tapped by a sword you were out of the battle having "died."

Our stretched out formation quickly closed in and became a tight ball. Five men protected Ren, including me. We were the close range fighters. Another five men sprung from behind us, and attacked the enemy from behind. Those were the fastest runners like Kaito and Gakupo.

Three of Mikuo's men trotted to the sidelines having been "killed." I saw four of our men follow.

Kaito struck down a person but in turn got tapped as well by another.

Amid bustling and crashing, I saw Mikuo coming for us. I'm pretty sure he plans to take Ren down.

Too bad I can't let him.

I looked around. Three men including him were left on his side, Gakupo and I plus Ren on our side.

We were losing.

I silently cursed. No matter what happens... I can't let them reach Ren.

_"I swore to be loyal to you and I won't hesitate in risking my life for you."_

Gakupo ran around the arena and stood at my side.

Ren tapped my shoulder, "Let me fight."

"If Gakupo loses then you'll fight."

I bet he was glaring at me but I didn't care. His safety was first priority.

Gakupo and I fought the three until everybody died except for Mikuo, Ren and I.

Mikuo's strikes were fast and small, making it hard for me to block them and for Ren to attempt to sneak in a hit.

Mikuo backed up and I knew he was going to charge at us and while he distracted one us he would attack the other. Suddenly, Ren, who's back was against mine, clasped his hand around mine. I frowned in confusion and Mikuo began to run towards us. In flash of an instant, I understood. I put my sword away and grabbed Ren's other hand strongly. Then, before Mikuo reached us, I lifted Ren on my back and he kicked Mikuo in the chest, toppling him down. Then, almost instantly, I retrieved my sword and held it against Mikuo's abdomen.

Funny how that crazy move had worked... We won.

Our side burst into cheer.

Mikuo got up angrily and walked to the King, "They're ready your Majesty... Ren can lead them into war."

Ren gave me a triumphant smile as did I and we shared another silent understanding. This was a great feat, not only for him but for me as well. We had proven our true worth to the King and nothing will stop us now.

Kaito and our people surrounded me, praising my teamwork with Ren. I was about to say that Ren was the one who thought of it when I realized the prince was gone. The King, his attendant, and Mikuo were gone as well. Had they all left together?

Somehow I felt the need to find him. I slowly removed myself from the group and searched for the blonde prince who was nowhere in sight. I then heard footsteps behind the Ren's knights' quarters (Mikuo's and the king's knights slept separately from us). I pressed myself against the corner and peeked behind the building.

"Stop running away!" Ren exclaimed as he followed a retreating Mikuo.

I felt kind of guilty for eavesdropping. I mean, this is not something an honorable knight would do.

I was about to leave when I heard something that perked my interest.

"Why do you hate me so much?" Ren yelled, confident that no one was hearing, "I had nothing to do with what happened six years ago!"

Six years ago... When my family had been murdered and...

Mikuo turned to face him and from a distance it looked as if her were crying, "It was your fault! If you would've never gotten better... If you would've remained sick... Rin would still be here!"

I felt something tighten within me. They were talking about the princess.

"You should be glad I got better! Rin wouldn't have ruled even if she did manage to stay in the kingdom!"

"I would've helped her find a way to rule! She was kind with her people and cared deeply for them! She would've been a much better ruler than you will ever be! You're the same as your father!"

_"People think of me as a heartless monster. Maybe it would be better if it were that way... If I were like my father I wouldn't be like this right now..."_

I tightened my fists to refrain from going to attack Mikuo. Ren is nothing like his father!

Ren's tone also increased, getting mad as well, "Why do you even care about Rin so much?"

"I loved her!"

I felt the breath get knocked out of my lungs.

Ren's eyes widened and he couldn't form any coherent words.

Mikuo got his sword out and began slashing at a rock angrily, "At first I thought of her as a little sister. She always looked at everything I did with admiration in her eyes... I realized too late that I had grown attached to her...realized too late that what I really felt was love."

"So thanks to you," he said and pointed at Ren, "I may never see her again! I will forever hate you for that!"

Mikuo looked as if he wanted to say more but instead ran away very angrily, tears streaming his face.

Ren, his back to me, silently crumpled to his knees. I slowly approached him and he wiped his face with the back of his hands before looking up at me.

"What happened?" He asked, avoiding my eyes but I had already seen that his eyes were red and moist.

Ren was crying?

"Nothing is wrong, the knights were worried when you suddenly disappeared." I said and then went silent, unsure of what else to say after everything I had overheard.

"Is everything okay?" I asked him, still hesitant on what to do.

Then without warning, Ren stood up, "Let's go back."

He avoided my gaze for the complete walk back. He didn't even stop to talk to the knights, he simply walked back to the castle. Had his talk with Mikuo really affected him that much? As I thought about how the teal-haired guy had confessed his love for Rin I felt some weird emotion within me... I don't understand it though... Don't know what it's called.

I walked back to the knights, "Prince Ren said we could have the rest of the day off and he'll meet us tomorrow."

They nodded, joyous from the victory. Kaito walked over to me and began talking but his voice was far off somewhere.

My mind was too full of different jumbled emotions that I didn't know what to feel. It was similar to trying to look at your reflection in a puddle of murky waters... You think you see a distorted shape there but then it's gone.

I don't know how I feel towards Ren anymore.

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

The next day I awoke and looked at the clock. Though I was still kind of drowsy my mind immediately sensed something was wrong. It was twenty past seven... Ren didn't come to wake us up.

I got up and dressed when the bell rang. I felt slightly relieved. Maybe Ren had just let us oversleep a bit due to yesterday's success.

As usual, everybody got dressed and headed down to the dining room downstairs. Most of the knights were in high spirits, joking around and laughing but it was suddenly cut short as entered the room. Standing in the center of the room was none other than Mikuo himself. As the Knight of Royal Protection I felt the need to find out what happened to Ren.

"Where's Ren?" I asked Mikuo, getting in front of the other knights.

"Everything will be explained soon. Eat breakfast quickly. I must lead you to the courtyard outside the castle. The King will make an important announcement."

I nodded and we sat down to quickly eat. I gulped down the food with very little bites in between. Kaito was doing the same but he started choking and had to drink a lot of water. In five minutes we were all done.

"Follow me." Mikuo said and began walking away.

We followed Mikuo towards to the open courtyard outside the King's balcony. The courtyard was very big yet this time, it was full. Most of the King's imperial army was standing there, in perfect formation, not moving. Mikuo signaled us to stand next to the larger group of soldiers, where a spot had been reserved for us. Imitating the others, we also took their position facing the balcony. I couldn't help but be amazed at the multitude waiting under the balcony. The army was first, followed by the castle's staff and court, and behind them stood the entire village people. I knew this wasn't the entire kingdom but the number was still overwhelming. Women, children, men, the elderly... All standing there waiting for a single man's word.

There had been small murmurings among the crowd.

"Do you think this is about the war?" Kaito whispered to me.

"Most probably..." I replied and then the crowd grew silent.

We all turned to face the balcony in which the King had now appeared.

"My people," he began, "It is with a heavy heart that I announce that our Kingdom is on the brink of war! The Kingdom of Red has issued a declaration of war and as the prideful country we are we cannot decline!"

I sneered. If what Ren said had been true, this war could've been avoided.

"But fear not my good people, our army has been preparing for this and my son has even created a special attack group, the Black Knights, to aid us in the war. As we speak, Prince Ren is on a diplomatic mission in the Kingdom of Green, forming an alliance for the coming war."

The crowd cheered. I felt immediately relieved… So that's where Ren is.

"We will win this war! We shall win and once again name Yellow a powerful country!"

More cheers.

"As tradition calls that in time of war children of the crown must be present, I have brought said child."

"Didn't he just say Ren was in Green?" Kaito muttered to me but his eyes widened as he saw who appeared on the balcony.

Everyone was awestruck so I decided to look up and see what the big deal was. Had Ren suddenly returned?

I felt my heart stop as I saw the figure next to the king. Looking exactly like Ren stood a girl with short blonde hair, her bangs separated by pearl clips, and a small tiara on her head. A flowing blue dress just made her sea blue eyes stand out more. Now I see why the crowd had gone silent... She was beautiful.

"I present before you my daughter, Rin Kagane who will oversee matters of the war until Ren returns which will be soon."

I felt my lungs run out of air. There, standing before the multitude, stood the princess who had saved my life so many years ago…

Rin Kagane.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So how was that? BD I really hope to make another chapter soon but I'm currently working on finishing chapter 14 and also the newest chapter of Nekonian Demon Rin story…. Those should be done halfway through next week… **

**Thank you all for your support on this story!**

**Review Responses:**

**Xitlalit123: Ahh thank you very much sorry for the delay **

**Asianchibi99: awww thank you and I will love YOU forever ;3;**

**Novaki Monderin: I sent you a PM regarding your comment, no? Well I'll just once again rephrase how flattered I was by your review… It is the nicest thing anyone has told me for this story so far. I literally wanted to cry ;w; And about the room thing… something like that is going to happen :D**

**Vocaloid-Issa-Infinite: Thank you! Hmm, that might be soon… owo**

**Az-Sticker: thank you ^u^ Yes he will find out..soon**

**MaddyTheAwesome: Yes he will owo and thank you**

**Clavemien Nigram Rosa: Sorry for the wait ^u^'**

**TheSapphireRose: Thank you very much I tried to make it as unique as possible**

**Zarisa: Not quite… yet it is in some parts. Have you heard Chivalry and Lost Destination? It is based off those songs ^u^**

**Dead Alice In Wonderland: Oh really? ;u; that is so nice X') thank you very much sorry for the wait**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I'm baaaack~! Sorry for not updating sooner but I've been extremely busy but I won't bore you with the details xD In compensation, I have written this 6,000+ word chapter **

**Hope you guys enjoy it and please leave behind your awesome reviews~! Thank you!**

* * *

><p><strong><strong><strong>°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°<strong>****

**It Would Be Easier if I Could Hate You**

**Chapter 6: Always Expect the Unexpected**

******°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°******

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

I stared breathlessly at the image my eyes were beholding. My limbs went numb and my throat was dry. The crowd gasped and murmured as they stared at the long forgotten princess. Her face remained relatively the same from our last and only encounter six years ago. She had always remained such a distant fragment of my memory, the only bright part of my dreadful past. That seeing her way up there seemed like a dream. I felt that when I finally accepted she was real, everything would vanish into thin air. I dared look away for a moment to look at my companions. Kaito was completely awestruck, standing there with his mouth agape. Mikuo looked the most shocked. His teal eyes were so wide it looked like they were going to pop out of their sockets. His lips moved slowly, as if reassuring himself that she really was there. His legs visibly shook and his fellow knight gripped his arm in order to keep him standing. The color had left his face and he looked completely different from the guy who clashed with Ren the day before.

_"I loved her!"_

The words floated back into my mind. Mikuo loves the princess Rin. He hasn't seen her for six years and suddenly, there she is, looking as beautiful as ever. The little girl who had saved my life so many years ago... I felt an alien emotion well up within me. It wasn't the fiery, sharp feeling of hatred and vengeance that usually dominated me. What is this warm, light feeling? I scoffed, whatever it is, it's repulsive.

"I am back home," the princess said and looked at the multitude, "As Ren has done up to this point, I shall also do my best to lead you until his return."

Her soft, sweet voice shattered the deathly tension caused by extreme shock. When she spoke, everything became truly real. I blinked rapidly, and it seemed like everyone let out the breath they had been holding since Princess Rin had appeared. Mikuo's eyes then darted to me and he looked like he wanted to leave but he had to stay and guard his troops.

"She's just like the prince, but prettier." Kaito whispered to me and I unconsciously nodded in reply.

The crowd erupted into cheers, glad that the situation of the war against Red was under control and that their loved princess had finally returned. I looked down at the pavement. I couldn't look at her without memories of my family's murder resurfacing. The King stood besides Rin, looking out onto the crowd as well. I immediately wanted to strangle him. IT'S HIS ENTIRE FAULT!

"Len, do you think that-"Kaito began to say but was cut off short as a high pitched shriek pierced the air.

My fighting senses kicked in immediately and in less than five seconds I had my sword in my hand. Luckily, I wasn't the only one. Kaito, cheerful Kaito, tensed and quickly extracted his own sword from its navy blue scabbard. His usually sparkling royal blue eyes flickered with cold determination. He looked like a true knight.

The entire Black Knights had already taken fighting positions and the royal army soon followed. The one scream became many and I soon figured out what had happened: We were being ambushed.

I looked up to the balcony in time to see Rin and her father tackled into the room by a secret service official (yes they exist). The door was locked and somehow the alarm bells began to chime its chilling pattern. I had only heard those bells once in my life.

We quickly spread apart, going to see where the intruders were. They had attacked from behind, knowing we'd all be at the balcony. The few knights that were keeping watch had been distracted by the princess' arrival.

"EVERYONE SPREAD OUT! PROTECT ANYONE YOU CAN! KILL ANY INTRUDERS IF NECESSARY AND CAPTURE PRISONERS!" Mikuo yelled over the chaotic flurry of movement.

It was hard to see anything at all. People were running around in a panicked frenzy. You couldn't tell who was friend or foe until you saw them stab someone else. I couldn't easily attack anyone for fear that he or she was a mere frightened citizen. The sounds of clashing metal were micked with cries that traveled through the cold air. I roughly pushed past people, my body getting batted by people who were larger than me. I spotted two kids in a corner and a third taller figure. I was about to keep on running when I saw something glint. I violently dug my heels into the pavement and made a sharp turn towards them.

"Aaargh!" I yelled and intersected the deadly path his sword was following. The children behind me gasped and remained frozen with fear.

It's funny how a seemingly perfect situation can turn awry in the blink of an eye. I had once again seen my guardian angel from six years ago and now, I was fighting. It wasn't the challenging, fun fighting I did with Kaito or Ren. This is the type of bitter fighting in which there can only be one winner. This is the type of fighting in which the greatest prize is being able to live for a while longer. This is the type of fighting in which luck means you saved another's life.

This is war.

The man I was fighting now, probably in his mid twenties, was probably thinking the same thing. We had nothing personal against each other. It simply came down to the fact that it was either his life or mine. And in this case, my life weighed twice as much due to the defenseless children besides me. To kill him here would be an honorable fight and death. The massacre of my village was nothing of this. They weren't fighting for the good of their people! It was cold murder by greedy people! Therefore no, it is not forgiven. It shall never be forgiven until I have avenged their deaths!

The guy tried swerving around me in order to get to the children. Without a moment of hesitation, I twisted my wrist and struck the sword into his unprotected side. He cried out in pain and fell to his knee and then simply toppled over, facing the ground. Red liquid poured out his side and wiped the perspiration off my brow. I didn't know if he was dead, but at least he would remain immobile. I looked back at the children. Their eyes darted back and forth between my sword and the man on the floor.

"Go somewhere safe and stay there until these guys are gone." I told them.

Their eyes were wide with fright. They were glad they had been saved. But for all they knew, I had just killed someone. In kid standards, killing is the most frightening thing ever. Death is scarier than any mythical monster. I knew that from personal experience. I had saved them but then killed someone right in front of them.

They had been rescued by a monster.

They stood there for another while before scurrying away. Suddenly, something cold hit my cheek. I looked up at the now grey skies to see tiny, white flakes falling daintily. It's as if it were a reminder that around this very season six years ago, I had been like those children…terrified and cold…alone and hopeless.

I looked at my pale hands that soon held tiny snowflakes. I had just killed a guy. I know I've been planning to kill the King and maybe even Ren but I hadn't actually killed anyone before. Now that I had done it, there was no going back. Ren…he did this all the time, didn't he? No wonder he was so strong… He feared nothing. He was beyond fearing death. I, on the other hand, am still… I clenched my fist, crushing the delicate snow. I am still weak!

I ran away once again, fighting any intruders I managed to come by. After twenty minutes of absolute discord, we had managed to get rid of all them. We met up at below the balcony once again. In total there were thirty men. Fifteen were dead, five were injured and ten were going to be kept as prisoners. Kaito tied the last two men together with thick rope and handed me their swords. I threw them with the others.

"There," Kaito mumbled as he walked towards me, "That was the last of them."

I nodded. Though he might try to act normal, my blue-haired companion was pretty shaken up. We all were. Nobody had expected that sudden attack. Everything still seemed like an alien scenario…still a very life-like dream.

We heard approaching footsteps and we all looked up immediately. My hand flew to the hilt of my sword. Kaito's jaw tightened as we waited for the approaching figures. It turned out to be the King…and Rin.

Mikuo stood at the front of the knights and he blinked rapidly when he spotted the princess. Then we all simultaneously bowed before the king. I raised my cerulean eyes to see what was going on.

"Your Majesty, we were unexpectedly ambushed but as you see here we got everything under control. There were a total of thirty invaders, more than half dead or injured. Our side had only seven casualties." Mikuo spoke.

When I looked up, the princess was looking down at me. Her sea blue eyes reflected worry and concern. They were exactly like Ren's… Her small lips slightly twitched into a smile, the way Ren would "smile" sporadically. I bent my head downwards once more. Why did I keep on comparing her to Ren? It's not like I wish he were here or anything. It's just that the similarities are extremely striking. She and Ren reminded me of my deceased siblings: Rei and Rui. They were exactly alike except for their gender. But they were gone now and Rin still had Ren. He wasn't a bad guy at all…

Princess Rin remained standing near me, not even going near Mikuo. Did she remember me? I innerly shook the thought away. A maid came up to her and they left.

"The unexpected ambush calls for extra security and patrol around the castle! Mikuo, order your troops to guard all perimeters," the king ordered and then eyed Ren's troops, "and you…don't stand in their way."

My eyes narrowed down angrily and for once in my entire life I felt the urge to do a very child-like gesture: to stick my tongue out in defiance and then stomp away. I remembered the time when I walked in on Ren in the middle of his attack against the tree before he told me about the war. He had been angry because his father had said we were useless…and now I feel his very inflaming anger.

"Very well, Highness." Mikuo stated and bowed until the evil king retreated.

Then, Mikuo skillfully divided up the entire troops into different sectors. One would patrol the outside, another inside, and finally one would train. These sections would rotate every day. It was an effective plan, but we weren't really a part of it.

Not that it surprised me though… Mikuo and Ren clearly weren't on good terms. So instead it was I who took command of Ren's troops. I tried thinking the way he would, for as I mentioned it before, though he might be a future enemy, I admire his intellect in warfare. I assigned each of us a position to take care of where the King's men were not situated. If Red was smart and tried to invade again, these would be the places to attack first since they would know there would be no vigilance. Though the idea didn't please them all too much, no one protested. Kaito was assigned to the kitchen, Gakupo to the servant's quarters and so on…

Mikuo turned to Rin, realizing a bit late that the main goal was to keep the royals safe. Then he turned his teal eyes to me and his eyebrows twitched along with his mouth.

"Len…" he said and turned away, "I'm going to guard the King's quarter's…please…guard Rin…"

I nodded, determined to protect the princess no matter what. She had, after all, saved my life before.

"…with your life."

"I will." I swore and he didn't even turn to look at me but instead walked away, his knights dispersing to the areas they had been assigned.

Mikuo loves Rin and I am indebted with her, two strong reasons to guard her with my life. Ren's image once again flashed in my mind and I slightly smiled (if you could even call it that).

I'd take care of her for his sake as well.

* * *

><p><strong>Rin's P.O.V<strong>

I rapidly ran into my room, Luka on my heels. I'm extremely grateful that she fetched me or else I would've found no excuse to leave.

I grabbed all the bandages that lay hidden in one of my drawers and placed them in a secret compartment under my bed. If for some reason the drawers were opened, all they would find would be Ren's clothes. Sure, it sounds weird but after what happened today I learned to always expect the unexpected. That ambush had caught us totally off guard! And what's worse, I couldn't help at all! I was merely pushed down in order to be "protected" when we were the ones who were supposed to be doing the protecting!

I gripped some of the nearest golden earrings and flung it at the wall. Tears threatened to run down my face and I trembled in anger. I hate being Rin! I hate being powerless!

Luka, sensing my building rage, wrapped her arms around me in a comforting manner. A soothing feeling washed over me and I felt my body go limp. She was a pink haired angel capable of controlling a golden dragon.

"Rin… With this sudden ambush, someone will most definitely be placed in charge of your safety. What if the one turns out to be…?"

"I can't let Mikuo be near me," I whispered, "He'd see through the biggest lie of my life…"

_"Why do you even care about Rin so much?"_

_"I loved her!"_

I gritted my teeth. I could've done so much better without that information… little did he know he confessed his love for me to me. I can't let him know that I know what he feels for me…

My heart whirled a little and I gave a frustrated groan. Stupid, emotions are plain stupid…

A knocking interrupted my thoughts. Luka quickly opened the door to reveal none other than Mikuo himself.

Luka's eyes darted from his, to mines, and then back.

"May I speak with the Princess?" he asked.

She turned to me and I nodded slowly, there would be no avoiding our confrontation either way.

"Then please excuse me Madam." Luka said, bowed, and left without another word.

My back was facing Mikuo so I could only hear his approaching footsteps.

"It's been a while…"

"It has…" I whispered and suddenly I felt afraid to turn around. I had seen Mikuo many times, even hurt him physically from time to time, but never like this…never with this sense of insecurity surrounding me.

"I've missed you a lot…"

That's when everything shattered and I felt a tear roll down my cheek. My old friend…the reason for my success… The laughter, the joy…

"Me too…"

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me towards him. I returned the embrace, letting myself be carried away by my emotions, if only for a moment. I felt his warmth and I smiled for I had long forgotten what it was like to feel a protective heat from someone else.

I looked up to see Mikuo shed a single tear from his teal eyes. After fighting against him and protecting myself from his hostilities as Ren, I had forgotten this side of his that I had only seen during my childhood days.

If there was an advantage to being Rin, it was the ability to have friends….and not have to let them go. I could now do things Ren couldn't… Sure, weak things, but now I could actually show much I _care_…

We remained there for a moment, in each other's arms until Mikuo cleared his throat.

"Rin, there is something I must tell you…"

I gulped and looked around, having an idea of what might come next.

"During the time that we spent together, I realized…" he muttered and ran a hand through his hair.

Knock-Knock.

I let out breath that I hadn't realized I had been holding. Mikuo went to open the door and I once again turned around to rapidly wipe at my face.

"Excuse me, but Princess Rin needs to oversee the matters of her brother's troops."

I froze at the sound of the voice. The last thing I needed was for both of the men who have conflicted my emotions to be in the same room.

"I understand Len, I just came to talk to inform her of the security measures taken by our regiments. I'll convey your message."

Len left fortunately and I walked to the door, ready to leave before Mikuo said another word.

"I must go," I told him and was halfway through the door when he caught my hand. I froze instantly, not used to anyone but Luka embracing me and pulling on me.

"Can we talk later?"

I nodded, but deep within me I feared the thought of another encounter with him. Hopefully, I will spend all my time with Len and the knights that by the time we finish it would be too late.

I walked down the stairs and onto the courtyard, having difficulty moving around in a dress. How long has it been, seven years? And these heels…I wish I could through them far away from here. I've grown so used to being Ren that now…

…I feel vulnerable.

I arrived at my knights' quarters to find them already in line formation, ready to receive orders. I felt pride well within me, one of the only emotions I am familiar with.

They all bowed down to me and I was taken slightly aback until I realized I wasn't Ren anymore…they were dealing with a total stranger. I didn't like that at all…

"Princess Rin, we stand by for your orders." Len stated as he stood in front of the rest, "Ren would've wanted it that way."

"Please… Rin would just be fine, no need for-for that other word." I replied, still uneasy and hateful towards the term.

His cerulean eyes narrowed slightly but he nodded and went back to stand among the rest.

I stood there, unsure of what to do. I wish I could give them a lesson or something but Rin isn't supposed to know much about fighting...or so it's supposed to be.

"From today's account we should've all realized that we should always expect the unexpected. No matter what you are doing, be on guard. There isn't a moment of hesitation during war or it could cost you your life. As comrades, always be alert for one another." I spoke calmly and then looked at Len specifically, "No matter what your past troubles have been, you must learn to trust one another. Never underestimate each other, for the time may come when the person you least expect will save your life. Trust is fundamental to success."

The young men murmured among themselves but silenced as I continued.

"That being said, trust cannot be easily gained." I looked around the group again, "Do not trust anyone outside this group for they might be traitors. As all of you might be aware of, my father and brother have many enemies ready to slice their throats and throw this kingdom into the pit of chaos. It might be a hard concept to understand, but never fear to trust your instincts… You will know who you can trust and who you can't by a mere look at their gaze."

The knights grew silent and Len gave me a questioning gaze which I quickly looked away from.

"You truly are Ren's sister…" Kaito spoke at last and smiled, "Welcome back."

The knights erupted into cheers and even stoic Len seemed to be smiling. They hugged each other and laughed joyfully after a day of gloom. I couldn't help the warm feeling that grew within me as I returned their happiness and my vision blurred with tears once more.

Besides Luka and Mikuo, this was the first time I was recognized and appreciated as my true self: a woman. I never thought I could feel this way…to feel truly accepted…

…To feel at home.

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

It was a nice feeling to have Rin around, I must admit. Yet, when she refused to be called princess, only old memories resurfaced. Painful memories…

I kind of wished she would remember me in order to thank her. Yet, serving her is enough to fill that debt…and at the same time I maintain my vow to Ren because I get the feeling that they are like the same person.

I sat apart from the knights as they sparred and Rin watched from afar. Would've it been Ren he would've rushed in there and yelled at them for being so slow. I watched as her golden eyebrow quivered when one of the knights was beaten by Kaito. Heh, maybe she shares more in common with her brother than I thought…just in a more peaceful manner.

From the speech she gave us, I noticed she shared Ren's talent for public speaking and had his wisdom as well. If I closed my eyes, maybe I could've even imagined him saying those exact words.

Mikuo had gone to see her as well. When I had knocked at her door, he had answered and Rin's back was facing me. I could tell something was going on and had left quite quickly even though it would've been more reasonable to wait and escort her there… Yet, for some odd reason, I found myself unable to stay…at least not while Mikuo was there. Could it be because he was Ren's enemy, I was hostile against him? Or could it be because Rin…

Why am I thinking about this in the first place, damn it?!

… Mikuo made Ren cry. Ren, the cold beast prince whom everyone feared had fallen on his knees and wept after the exam. For what reason, I might never know. Looking at Rin now, with a peaceful smile upon her face, compared to the tears she shed seven years ago when she defended me, made something move within my heart…

I made a silent vow to do whatever was in my power to not let that smile falter ever again. For Rin to cry was like an angel weeping itself… The three, Ren, Mikuo, and Rin have a past shrouded with mystery. I have no wishes to get involved whatsoever, but I shall protect Rin with my life, not only for the promise I made to Mikuo, but now for my own sake as well.

I stood up, maybe sitting down was messing with my brain… I couldn't think straight anymore. At the exact moment I stood up, Rin called the knights in for dinner.

Everyone was surprised that by the end of the day they still had enough energy to eat instead of going straight to sleep like usual.

Another surprise came when the palace cooks brought in dishes full of hearty food, something we hadn't eaten in a while. Under Ren's leadership, we had only eaten the minimum in order to get accustomed to what our diets might become in a war scenario. To be honest, we hadn't even seen the kitchen maids before. They were all pretty, but in my opinion Rin outshone them all…don't take it the wrong way.

I noticed one of them had teal hair and eyes. Could she be Mikuo's brethren? It was possible. I noticed Kaito's eyes followed her, like a lost puppy, and I rolled my eyes. Emotions like that merely get in the way…

Rin dismissed the kitchen maids and we all once again returned to being awestruck with the feast before us.

"Not everything in life is filled with hate and sorrow, even in times of war." Rin began speaking, "There is always the flame of hope that leads to eventual peace and joy. This feast before you today is to demonstrate that exact idea. Only wallowing in despair and misery will you gain absolutely nothing except death. And besides, a every grand triumph deserves a grand reward."

…Grand triumph?

"Ren told me about your victory against the King's men," she said with a warm smile, "Congratulations. If my brother hadn't been sent on a mission so quickly, he would've provided this feast as well, I'm sure of that. He…he has trained some great knights."

We all raised an eyebrow in questioning, still not used to receiving praise. Yet, to my own surprise, my lips curled up in a smile and I found myself whispering, "Thank you…"

The rest of the knight was merry and I almost had to laugh at the "discreet" attempts of some of the knights to flirt with Rin. They wouldn't go too overboard though… They valued their lives.

One of the maids offered me this pinkish liquid which I accepted, seeing that the rest were drinking it too. I couldn't be skeptical of everything I eat or else I'd starve to death. Castle food sure tasted funny though…

At the end, everyone dispersed to the areas that I had assigned them. No one opposed my commands, like we do with Ren. So this is what it felt like to have power… No, this is what it felt like to have respect. Then a thought formed in my mind. With Ren out of the picture, I had become the strongest knight of our group.

Wait, Ren is gone… This could be a perfect chance to kill the King, especially now that I was placed in charge of Rin. I had access to the inside of the castle now… It was all…perfect. Now I wouldn't have to face Ren, who might have a chance of killing me before I reached his father.

…it would've been perfect if Rin weren't here. I would need to kill her too if I were to carry out the plan for surely she would try to protect the King, no matter how much resentment she had against him…and that was something off limits. I couldn't kill Rin, anyone but her.

My revenge would have to wait, now wasn't the right time.

I escorted Rin to the castle and she looked at me a couple of times, looking away when I caught her gaze.

"This is enough Len, I can go from here." She said, smoothing out her blue dress, "Thank you."

"I'm sorry your majesty, but I was placed in charge of you. Therefore I must stay by your side." I stated calmly, "Protecting the royal family is our main concern."

Her sea blue eyes widened and they darted around in a nervous manner.

"Very well then," she said and led the way inside, "If that is how it is, then so be it."

I refrained from being fascinated by the interior of the castle. I'd never stepped foot in here before, always avoiding it at all times. The floor seemed to glow, reflecting the moonlight. Crystal chandeliers hung high above our heads, and many golden decorations adorned the room. The walls seemed to be as smooth as silk and the long windows let light dance around the now dark room. How is it that this one room holds more riches than most villages? Now it becomes easier to understand why revolts have been started over the course of time…the monarchs have too much wealth and power while we have little or none.

Rin's pale face was illuminated by the light, her eyes shining like tiny blue crystal orb, her golden hair glittering. She titled her head in order for me to follow her. I felt my breath get caught in my throat and I don't know what happened but my face heated up. Since when do I blush damn it?!

I followed Rin upstairs and we entered a room. It was very spacious but had little decorations. It only contained a couple pieces of furniture and a dresser with a golden mirror. Not very girly if you ask me…

"This is my brother's room, I feel safer in here." Rin whispered.

My body stiffened. We were in Ren's room? So this is where the Prince has lived his life… For some reason, knowing that this was his room made me more attentive to every detail.

"When will Ren return?" I asked out loud.

"I don't know…but I want him back here as soon as possible."

"Even if it means you'll leave again?"

She grew silent and turned around, "I-If it means that the kingdom will be safe in his hands, it can go on without me. They don't need me… No one does."

Her words truly shocked me. She had been smiling earlier so it was hard to imagine she had inner turmoil. Like Ren, who had broken down in front of me, Rin had a dark side no one else knew of but only I had glimpsed. Her figure began trembling and her small sniffles told me she was crying.

My body stiffened once again. What should I do? I don't know how to deal with these types of problems! For crying out loud, I can't even comprehend my own, locked up, emotions and I'm supposed to heal someone else's heart?! When Ren was on the verge of breaking down, I yelled some sense into him. I'm pretty sure I can't use the same method with Rin. I'm a knight with a sword, I kill…I don't… I don't heal…I don't love…

I'm not supposed to…

So like that, with a confused head, I hesitantly wrapped my arms around her. Rin's body tensed, not expecting my action any more than I had. I swore I'd stop her tears, even if I must betray some of my rules temporarily.

"We all need our princess…" I whispered into her ear. Even though I had just met her, Rin seemed like an old acquaintance… I felt more at ease around her than with others.

"L-Len? I-I'm sorry… I can't be crying like this. I don't know what happened to me." She apologized as she tried to dry her tears.

Then, the perfect response slipped from my lips, "A wise man once said 'You're only human. Humans have emotions...no matter how hard they try to erase them'."

Her eyes widened once again and nodded with a slight smile, "Thank you for reminding me."

I wanted to pull away immediately from our "embrace" but I figured that would be rude so I remained there, with my arms around her, unsure of what to do next. I hadn't been this intimate with someone since the death of my family. Back then, I hugged them all the time and the gesture was as natural as breathing. Now, the very thought of holding someone close like I was doing now, sent me crawling away in uneasiness and even a bit of fright. It was strange to be doing it again, especially with Rin. The person being Rin made things get, how do you call it, awkward? Yes, awkward, for two reasons. One, she was the princess and Ren could slice me into pieces for even touching his precious sister. Two, she looked way too much like Ren for my liking. I kind of expected her to jump up out of nowhere and start yelling at me for that same reason.

I admit it, I am a coward. Not on the battle field… I'm a coward who is afraid to open up because it might cause me more pain than I can handle. Ren, who opened up for a second, ended up depressed. Rin, cheerful little princess, was now crying in my arms…the arms of a stranger. I feared what would happen if I were to do the same, for it has been six years since I've shed a tear. Heh, maybe my eyes have dried out…

I don't truly want to find out.

Thankfully, Rin pulled away first and looked into my eyes, "Tomorrow can you accompany me to visit the families of those who died today?"

I nodded and couldn't help but smile at her caring nature, "Sure thing."

Her small hand placed a strand of hair behind her ear and she looked away, "Thank you, Len."

The sincerity in her words caught me off guard and for a moment I was at a loss for words. Was a mere "you're welcome" okay?

"D-Don't worry about it," I said and my eyes widened when I stuttered, "I'm here for you…it's my duty."

She smiled and then she once again looked around, "Er, so you are going to take care of me…even when I'm sleeping?"

I once again felt my cheeks flare. I turned around and nodded, "I must remain in this room until morning to guarantee your safety."

"I can take care of myself!" she assured me, narrowing her eyes.

"I know," I replied sincerely, "but I cannot defy orders for it would taint my name as well as Ren's."

"Alright," Rin muttered, though she looked shocked at my first statement, "But…"

I turned around, "You asked?"

"B-But…how will I change?"

"Well, that's easy to fix I'll…" I stated confidently at first and then my words trailed off, "I'll wait outside…Yeah, that's it."

So quickly, I walked outside and leaned my head against the door. Then, after making sure no one was watching, I punched myself.

What's wrong with me?! My body seems so foreign all of a sudden; I can't recognize what I am feeling... Ugh, my head… it's getting hot again… what the hell is that supposed to mean? A fever…?! Some weird sickness..?!

…Embarrassment?

No, it would be most likely some weird sickness than embarrassment. I mean, when do I get embarrassed? I've never been embarrassed before and I don't plan to start now! You hear me?!

I clutched my head. No more stupid thoughts, okay? No more heat, okay? Only hateful thoughts…Necessary thoughts…

A soft knocking interrupted my inner monologue and my hairs all stood on end. If I would've known this was going to happen… Mikuo can take this job damn it! I need to clear my head… I should guard the King and then not kill him. Yep, I should totally not kill him. Hehehe, no sarcasm being used here, nope, none at all…

I'm going crazy aren't I?

Once more, knocking interrupted my inner conflicts and I remembered that I hadn't answered the first time.

"Len..? You can come in now…"

I took a gulp of air and turned the knob. So much uneasiness I could easily throw up…

I walked inside and Rin scurried to her bed, almost sinking in the blankets. Her eyes reflected…fear?

"Okay so, you go to sleep now." I told her, feeling stupid at the obvious comment.

"Okay…G-Goodnight."

"Sleep well…"

I leaned against the wall, my sword in hand, trying to find a comfortable standing position. Rin turned over a couple of times, not finding sleep. After about two hours, when she finally fell asleep, I walked over to the window and looked outside. Everything looked extremely peaceful…

I didn't feel sleepy or tired, so why were my eyelids drooping? My mind is growing drowsy for some odd reason…

I staggered against the column that was there and gripped the white marble with my two hands. Everything began to spin and get out of proportion.

Damn it…I had been drugged.

My senses were spinning at a hundred miles per hour and I bent over in pain. I began heaving heavily and I could distantly feel my brow accumulating sweat. Something was killing me on the inside… I couldn't feel my body... Damn it all!

I tried crawling towards Rin, keeping my sword in hand. I needed to warn her, someone must be trying to…

At that exact instant, the glass shattered next to Rin's bed. I had managed to crawl up to her bed and was now trying, with extreme difficulty, to stand up.

Not had a few seconds gone by before Rin shot out of her bed, clothed in, opposed to a nightgown, light training garments.

She stood in front of me, her back facing me, but I still caught a glimpse of something shocking…a sword.

An overwhelming sense of déjà-vu shook my whole body. I had lived this before…

Rin stood there, here teeth bared, with a sword in her hands, once again protecting me.

Two enemy soldiers came in through the window.

"Princess, come on, don't be rash. You can't even use a sword I bet, so instead of getting hurt just come with us." One of them said as he walked towards us, "I might even spare your friend that's over there, though he might die soon anyway, with the poison we fed him."

I growled at him and was about to launch myself at them, pain or no pain, but Rin ordered me to stay put.

"Fools…" she began, "To try to take me first…Were you seeking ransom money? Well guess what? My father doesn't care about me and wouldn't give you a measly cent! He'd wait for Ren to come back and then you'd be destroyed. You want to kill Len too? Then fine go ahead…"

The intruders questioned her words but Rin glared at them before speaking again.

"Go ahead and kill him, but be ready for the consequences…your deaths!" Rin exclaimed, "I won't let anyone lay a finger on my comrades!"

Even if my vision was getting blurrier by the second, I still managed to notice some things when Rin struck the man in front of her.

One, she fought in the same style Ren did and two, she was wielding Ren's sword.

No two swords are alike, not in this kingdom or any other. I had noticed Ren's intricate sword design since the first time we fought. I'd never seen another sword like it in my life…

So if Ren was in a neighboring kingdom, where he could easily be attacked, he would most definitely take his sword with him. As a knight, one must always carry it around, both for protection and as a sign of power and pride. My own sword was never too far away from me. Kaito, even Gakupo had different swords that they always kept by their side.

That being said, why…

Why does Rin have Ren's sword?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Finally, I thought that I would never get back on here TTATT I missed this place~ Well now that I'm back writing expect me to stay for at least two or three more weeks :D Thank you for the overwhelming positive feedback on this story. Truly, it is one of the ones I enjoy writing the most since the words just seem to flow so smoothly. Thank you to all my loyal readers for sticking with me this far, we shall continue together until this is over! I am pleased, very pleased, with this story and its progress which has all been made possible by you guys, thanks!**

**Review Responses:**

**Orange Tsundere: Yes she is :) and for a couple of chapters too :D**

**Reinette-Cat: Yep, she doesn't want to tell him, even if he is her closest friend… Hm, I seem to create love triangles with him in it for some odd reason x(**

**ZXCVBMEM: Thank you very much! I'm glad you like it!**

**MaddyTheAwesome: Well…that's for me to know and for you to find out~ mwahahaha~! xD**

**Rinxlen fangirl: Sorry but I kind of left more cliffhangers… hehehe xD**

**Ten-Faced: Yes I'm sorry for some reason my phone auto corrected it =.= and yes it is truly hilarious **

**Dead Alice In Wonderland: Thank you, yes we will be reaching the climax soon :) and yes I like it too and therefore keep on unconsciously at first, forming love triangles xD**

**Lulu: No I won't drop it, thank you!**

**Tacypoc: Oh, thank you! I shall correct! And seriously? Thank you for your support and I would love more reviews TTwTT**

**12domba: Thank you~! :') I'm really glad you like it! Sorry for the lag in updates though… I've been busy x3**

**Demi-d-Chookies: Thank you for reminding me and I won't give up for you guys! Oh and about the drawing don't worry about it :)**

** 1: Thank you for that long review, I loved it. Also, thank you for your efforts in reviewing even though you have to translate it and stuff, thank you very much! Hehe, I try to imagine myself in that situation and use my imagination to write the fight scenes, I'm glad they aren't awkward :D Oh and good job on the book! The longest book I've read had almost a thousand pages x)**

**Blueberrygalaxy: sorry for the lag in updates, thank you for your review!**

**MercilessSpirit: Sorry for the late update, I've been extremely busy and thank you for your reviews!**

**Paige: Thank you very much for that review! It was one of the best ever coming from a fellow bookworm :) It would be easier to contact you or directly reply to your comments if you made an account but this works too :')**

**Guest: Sorry for the wait, I've been really busy.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Please forgive this sorry soul for updating so late… I've had personal issues going on and school (I'm taking four Advanced Placement courses) and aaahhhh it's been too much . but hey, I'm here now and think I have now managed to deal with the stress that I've had recently **** Thank you for your patience and please review~ Love you all!**

* * *

><p><strong>°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°<strong>

**It Would Be Easier If I Could Hate You**

**Chapter 7: Home**

**°∴✿° ·°✿∴° .·°∴°·. °∴✿°· °✿∴°**

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

I couldn't process what was going on. Not only was my head spinning at a thousand loops per second, but the impact of the scene in front of me was too much. Rin had Ren's sword. Why did she have HIS sword?

I tried moving the muscles in my arms in a futile effort to raise myself. I needed to help Rin. There was no way she could defeat them all. I can't let her save me once again. Not after working so hard to prove myself! I can't!

Yet, my entire body felt foreign to me. My mind could not control my body. Damp cheek pressed to the cold floor, all I could do was stare as Rin faced her opponents with a determined glare.

For a moment I swear Ren was in the room.

Then, just like that, she attacked them. Mercilessly stabbing one in the shoulder while kicking another in the chest. Baring her teeth with such hate… It was strange to see a princess, even Rin, fight like that, yet there was a surprising sense of familiarity in it to. Somehow, in the sub consciousness of my mind, the thought comforted me.

My heart began to slow down. I could feel it. There was chaos all around me but within me it was all going in slow motion. I couldn't feel the resounding clash of swords, nor hear the rushing footsteps of the incoming guards. The edges of my vision began to blur into a combination of black and gray swirls. I remembered then what the intruder told Rin…

Was I really dying?

My chest began to heave with some difficulty and I couldn't help but scowl at my state. Here I am, being saved by the same girl seven years later. I didn't accomplish what I had set out to do. I hadn't killed the king… I hadn't avenged my family… I hadn't become stronger… I hadn't…

Flashes of my old home sprouted in my mind. My mother's face, Rei and Rui… If I were to die now, then I'd like for them to be my last memories.

But, it didn't stop there. More quickly, without me being able to control them, flashbacks of my time with Ren appeared in my mind. The way his hand felt warm and human in mine when we made our pact. I remembered his break down on the hill the other day, the pain he had burrowed in his chest similar to mine. His tears… then only one person stood out from the rest. Why, I don't know. My mind was filled with Rin's face. Her smile and warmth… My promise to protect it at whatever cost.

Right now, she was all that mattered to me. I won't die. No, I can't die. I owe her that much.

My vision completely began to blur and Rin ripped herself from the grip of the guard that held her back. She ran towards me and knelt at my side. My eyelids grew heavy and all I could make out were her lips. They quivered. She must've been crying. Rin may have been yelling too, but all that reached my ears was a faint whisper.

"Hold on Len! Please, hold on!"

That is when my world went black and I slipped into a state of comforting unconsciousness. Yet, I thought the very last words I heard from her were, "We're going to war, damn it, you can't die!"

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

I slowly pried my eyes open, my eyelids feeling heavy and clumsy. My vision began to clear and soon I was aware of my surroundings. I was on white bed, with other white beds around me. The first thought that occurred to me was that I was dead. Everything in the room was too white. I was seriously considering the thought that I was truly gone until I felt something next to my arm. With slight numbness, I forced my head to turn to my left.

There, head resting on her folded arms, was Rin. Her eyelids twitched constantly, as if having very bad thoughts. Without even realizing it until I felt my muscles stretch, I smiled. Once I did realize though, I forced it to go away. I wasn't supposed to be smiling, damn it. I was supposed to be thinking horrible thoughts on how to kill a person. Recently, I've come to realize that as I spend more time with both Ren and Rin, I was beginning to lose my original purpose. It was only until now that I realized that I had to begun living more for them than for my father. The fire for vengeance was still there, I still felt it, but it didn't burn as bright. That couldn't happen. I would have to start getting back on track and setting boundaries between myself and the royal twins.

I once again turned to Rin. Could I really turn my back on her? I mean, she saved my life twice now. I owed her my loyalty at least, if it was even worth anything. Maybe I could still fight against Ren, maybe I would manage the courage to take him on and the entire Black Knights but to betray her…

I gritted my teeth and breathed out through my nose. I knew deep within me that I couldn't do that. She didn't have anything to do with the mess. No matter what happened, no matter who died… I would find a way to save her.

My arm got itchy so I slowly lifted one to scratch it. Rin's eyes flew open immediately and she reached for something under the bed.

It was the same sword from last night.

Once she realized no one was in the room besides us, hid it under the sheets again, quickly looked at me, then averted her gaze as if trying to figure something out.

I wanted to ask about it immediately but first I had to get my facts straight.

"What happened last night?"

"They poisoned your food. Someone in the kitchen is a traitor. As we speak they are all being interrogated. Knowing that the poison would have its effect around the time I would sleep, they decided to ambush my room. Their plan had been to kidnap me for ransom money as well as the power to make demands to my father. The war has now officially been declared by both countries, the papers signed and all. Red thought that the kidnapping would go well but…" She didn't finish, looking uneasy at the last part.

"But you put up an unexpected fight." I put in for her and then took the opportunity to ask, "Why do you have Ren's sword? Better yet, how do you know to fight?"

Rin's sea blue eyes landed on mine before closing them and taking a deep sigh as if knowing this would come eventually.

"It's not Ren's," She started, "He always knew the dangers of being a hated monarch so he taught me self-defense and how to wield several weapons. The sword is the same as his because he instructed me, that if anything were to happen to him, I would pose as him. Or if I were ever caught in a risky situation, using a replica of his sword, I could pretend to be him long enough to attack or escape."

"I see," I said and nodded, "It makes perfect sense. Ren, as always, thought of a strategy."

"No one told my father about this though. He was hiding like a coward throughout the ambush. Let the daughter be taken but not the crown. Let the kingdom burn but not the crown." Rin clenched her jaw a bit before relaxing, "Everyone regards me as weak. That is why… that is why Ren needs to return as soon as possible."

I frowned, "I never regarded you as weak, not then and not now so don't say that. You're probably stronger than more than half of Mikuo's regiment."

She smiled at the last part and I was inwardly content. My job was done for now.

A knocking at the door made us both turn our heads almost immediately. Rin's hand went under the bed once more before cautiously saying, "Who is it?"

"It's me, Luka your Highness. I was sent to inform you that your carriage is ready."

"Alright, thank you."

"Should I summon Mikuo to accompany you?"

Rin's eyes widened in alarm, "N-No… I'll get another escort. You may leave now."

Did she just stutter? She must've gotten worried for some reason. Does that mean she knows he loves her? Or does she actually return the… No, I doubt it… I really doubt it…

Small shuffling of steps was heard and the princess stood up to leave. Only then did I realize she no longer wore her training garments but instead wore a simple green dress. Somehow, it suited her perfectly.

"Is your Highn- I mean, are you going anywhere?"

"I am going to visit the families of the deceased that passed away during the courtyard ambush."

"I'll come with you." I asserted and flung the covers off.

"No! You're still recovering-"

"What better way to recover than stretching the muscles? Besides, if Ren were here he probably would've kicked me out of bed and made me run laps to recover."

"He isn't THAT strict." She defended while slightly pouting.

"I was kidding."

"I- wait… did you just try to make a joke?"

I shrugged and put my boots on. My sword was on the small nightstand next to me. I easily hung it from my belt and looked up to find Rin still staring blatantly at me.

"What?"

She blushed a bit before walking out the door, "Nothing."

Rin was officially back to normal.

* * *

><p><strong>Rin's P.O.V<br>**

Despite my protests, Len still tagged along on my trip to the village. I was silently glad he insisted on coming or I might've actually had to call Mikuo. That wouldn't be good at all, especially with our impending conversation…

Then again, I also felt pride within myself. I had trained a sturdy knight.

Of the citizens who died, most of them were from the village Yukigakure… The Village Hidden in the Snow. After about an hour, the carriage slowed to a stop.

I got off followed by two of the Black Knights and Len as well. Immediately, I was taken aback by what I saw. This same village… seven years ago…

A massacre had occurred.

Len looked around and looked almost as shocked as I was, if only for one second. Almost immediately he regained his composure and waited for me to lead the way.

The village was known for being hidden near the foot of a mountain so that it was almost always covered in snow. Usually it was a calming sight, seeing so much snow. Now our inch deep footprints threatened to open a scar in my heart. The village hadn't been too poor before the war, but even after seven years, the reparations were still incomplete. The only thing they had been known for was their clan of excellent swordsmen. Ironically, that was what led to their demise.

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

I felt their eyes bore into every part of my being. I held my head high but inside I was trying not to quiver in shame. A member of the royal family comes to, not make amends for the event years ago, but instead apologize for the deaths of more of their people. Why hadn't I tried to reach out to these people before? I could've done something, anything, to try to compensate…

I knocked on the first house, breathing deeply as the door pried open to reveal a worn woman with frilly gray hair covering her tired eyes. Her eyes widened slightly as she recognized me and made way for me to pass.

Her eyes were kept to the floor the entire time, as if knowing what was to come.

"I'm truly sorry to inform you that…"

It would be useless to describe the rest. She stood there, processing the information, before breaking down in tears. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Len whisper something to one of the other Black Knights and then leave. It surprised me a bit, but I let him be as I tried my best to comfort the broken mother. After being Ren for so long, I had nearly forgotten how to console someone. I had nearly forgotten what to say, what to do. Luckily, there was a part of me that remembered…

…A part of me that still held on to the painful emotions of the heart.

* * *

><p><strong>Len's P.O.V<strong>

It was still unbelievable to think that I was walking down the same path that I used to take home through my entire childhood. The falling snow did not faze me at all, I had lived here for so long that it was a daily occurrence. My footprints seemed to cover other prints that were still fresh from the past, almost as if I had never left. It was easy to block out my time at the castle and think back to when I still lived here… It seemed like it was yesterday.

Almost unconsciously, my body led the way towards what used to be my home and part of me wished that my father didn't live there anymore. It had only been a couple months since I had moved out but things had changed. My life had changed. If I saw him now, he would surely remind me of my oath…

An oath I had been having second thoughts on.

Hesitantly, my cold knuckles rapped against the wooden door. I inwardly shivered as I heard slow footsteps approach and then the door was opened.

My father's eyes widened slightly, as if wondering what I was doing there, before his worn out and wrinkled cheeks raised in a small smile. Though I hadn't been gone for long, Father seemed to have aged years. He looked so burdened, alone… miserable.

He moved to let me come through and I silently entered the house, waves of nostalgia crashing against my body with every step.

"It's been a while." Father murmured and I nodded.

"Word travels faster than any steed," he continued, "And word has reached this village that you have slowly climbed up the ranks of the King's court."

"I have, Father. I was entitled to the position of second in command of the Black Knights, Prince Ren's personal squad, and was named the Royal Knight of Protection as well."

"I had no doubt you would achieve greatness, Len. You are now the sole person who could take revenge on our behalf. Your mother and siblings are proud, I'm sure. Believe me son when I tell you that if this old body were not feeble and broken I would readily take the task. Yet, this is not possible you see and therefore all my hopes, mine and all the village as well, are on you."

When he finished, I felt an emotion that I hadn't felt in a while… The sensation of a sinking heart. These people, my people, counted on me to do something and now…

Who was I to betray?

My father took my silence as an acceptance gesture and left for the back room. I sat there numbly, thinking it hadn't been a good idea to come.

A couple of moments later he came back into the room with something in his hands. It was thin and covered with an old dusty cloth. It almost seemed like a…

He uncovered it to reveal a black shield with a golden edges and a matching emblem on the front center: our clan's coat of arms.

"I think its about time you use this. Before you didn't have any use for it, but now… it will defend you in war."

"Thank you." I told him sincerely and then took the shield in my hands. I attached it to my left arm and found it fit perfectly. Then I cleared my throat, knowing Rin would finish her business soon.

"I must get going since I am only here escorting the Princess. Farewell."

I turned to leave and opened the door when my Father spoke again.

"Remember your oath always, but more importantly… stay alive."

I looked at him with a determined gaze and nodded firmly. He didn't even need remind me.

✿.·°∴✿°· °✿

I decided that before I went back to Rin I needed to make a quick stop. There was a little mound near the end of the village, more towards the mountains, that was usually a small haven from the constant snow. It was protected by the trees and rocks, not letting everything be covered by the white soft but deadly blanket.

My mother and siblings had loved that place. It was their little hiding place, their small paradise that only they knew of. It protected them from the harsh winters but it couldn't ward off everything…

Now it served as the site for their tombs.

Arriving at the spot, I noticed that there were tiny flowers surrounding the three tombstones, as if nature were always looking out for them. I placed the shield aside and slowly crumpled to my knees. I recited a reverent prayer and then stared blankly at them.

There was no use denying it, my emotions were slowly returning whether I liked it or not and I would simply have to deal with it. Yet now was one of those moments where I wished I could return to being nearly emotionless so I wouldn't be fazed… So my throat wouldn't knot and my chest wouldn't ache. How long has it been since their bodies have been buried under the cold ground, their skin no longer lush, their arms no longer embracing me?

"Hey Mom, Rei, and Rui," I began, not really knowing what to do, "I'm sorry for not visiting sooner, but you know what I've been up to, revenge and stuff."

I passed my hand through my messy blond hair and gave an exasperated sigh, "I have no idea what to say. Do I just talk and rant off on my problems? Shouldn't I come to venerate and not burden you? I don't know what to do!"

My hands clenched into fists, "For once I don't know what do! I need help! Mom, please tell me what I should do… I'm lost. On one hand Father wants me to take revenge and on the other… Ren isn't a bad guy. He really isn't. He wasn't the one responsible for your deaths so should he still die for it? Should he be one more of the deaths that taint his father's throne? Tell me the answer! Should he die? Should I kill him? Then there is also Rin… Mom, you'd really like Rin. As I'm here she is giving her condolences to those who died in an ambush a day ago. She's the one who saved me after your deaths. Rin's been my guardian angel these past years, her smile has kept me from going insane at some points, you know? I would give my life for her in a heartbeat… I know I have to keep my oath but I… I-I can't hurt her no matter what anyone says."

By that point tears had started to roll down my face, the cold wind quickly drying them as they fell.

"The twins have been making me feel things again. They're making me open up my carefully constructed barrier that took years to create! I.. I have friends now. Before, I didn't even want to even think of the term and now I ended up with them. I care for people. I care for Rin… I-I-I don't know what do. I don't want to leave that all behind… I know it has to be done for your revenge but my will is growing weaker day by day. Forgive me. Forgive me for wavering on my oath. Do you even want revenge? Please guide me… I am lost and you know what? I'm scared. I'm scared of these new found emotions… I'm scared of the pain. Help me, Mom…"

I heard the snapping of twigs and I quickly turned around, my hand already unsheathing my sword. My shoulders visibly dropped as I saw the emerging figure. Rin was standing there, her face pale from the cold and her sea blue eyes wide with shock. They darted from me to the shield to the tombstone. Had she finally realized…

"Kagamine Genevive, Rei, and Rui…" she whispered, "Kagamine Len… seven years ago…"

I remained silent, wiping the fresh tears from my face.

"That was _you_?" Rin asked slowly, her entire body shaking.

I nodded, inwardly glad she had finally connected the pieces together.

"I knew you reminded me of someone, someone from the past, but I couldn't figure out who. You were the last survivor of the Kagamine Clan from this very village! You were the one who saw this massacre take place… I couldn't… I couldn't… Why didn't you tell me?" She questioned in a strained manner.

Then, without warning, she came up to me, "Unsheathe your sword."

I did as told, noticing how her beautiful eyes were brimming with tears. She then kneeled in front of me, not caring about her dress.

I stared at her dumbfounded until she spoke, "It is time I set something right. I couldn't save your family or this village so it is time I pay in my father's name. With your loved ones present whom we have harmed, kill me."

I blinked rapidly, not sure if I had heard her right.

"Kill me, Len. Take revenge for your entire village! My life won't make up for theirs but at least I'll be at peace! This entire war is wrong and it wouldn't be an honorable death but here I can redeem the royal crown."

My hand gripped the sword with so much strength that my knuckles turned white. Then, my limbs all began shaking. She had nothing to do with this… Neither did Ren, so why should they pay for another's crime? If the King would be in her place, my hand wouldn't hesitate in swinging my blade. Yet, Rin… Once again, tears began to roll down my cold cheeks. Damn it, I should really stop doing that…

"Why do you ask of me an impossible task?!" I questioned through gritted teeth, "WHY?!"

With that, I stabbed the snow with my sword and embraced her. I don't know why but in that moment I needed to feel warm arms surrounding me. I needed to feel that not all in my life was hopeless and dire. Rin tensed at my sudden action but then slowly returned the embrace.

"What do you think this kingdom would do without you? What do you think Ren would do without you? What would _I _do without you? You aren't responsible for what happened back then! In fact, you saved my life! How do you expect me to even remotely think about taking yours? Stop thinking you are no use to this kingdom because you would make a better monarch than anyone I know! Don't ever think about throwing your life away in order to compensate anything. Instead, strive to build a better future! I'll be there next to you whenever you need me so please… please don't cry."

"I'll only stop if you do." She remarked with a slight giggle.

Then she lifted her index finger to wipe one of my tears away, "I never thought you could cry. I've never seen you do it and now that you have... I'm reminded of how human we all are. I guess I'd forgotten that. Ren too. Thank you for allowing me to see this side of you. I know it is difficult and painful, but it has to be done in order to _truly_ live. I promise that I will be more open to you too. Thank you, Len."

She looked up at me and planted a small kiss on my cheek. I hoped that my blood would be too cold to rush to my face but apparently it wasn't and I felt a slight blush dust my cheeks. We both stood up and wiped off our clothing. I retrieved my things and we headed back, feeling a great weight lifted off our shoulders.

When we got to the castle, Kaito immediately ran out to meet us. I thought it was an issue of being low on ice-cream or something until I saw his frightened face.

"Len! I need your help!"

"What is it?"

"Miku, one of the kitchen maids, is going to be sent to jail for supposedly poisoning you but I know she didn't do it! I know she's innocent! Len, you have to help me save her!"

That is when I remembered that we still hadn't figured out who poisoned me…

We had a spy within the castle and it could be literally anyone…

Kaito's eyes looked at me pleadingly and it was then that I knew he truly believed in this girl's innocence. I guess I should start changing my attitude now, for Rin's sake overall… that would mean starting to believe in others and trusting them as well.

"Fine, let's go. Where is she?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: There. It's done for now. Next chapter shouldn't take long. Most of my issues have been resolved or dealt with so you guys can expect more updates soon, ok? For real this time **** I will continue my one month thing starting November since this month is almost over **** Until then I will update what I can. Thank you to all who've had the patience to stick by my side. Seriously, I don't know how you deal with me, I really don't xD but that doesn't mean I'll ever stop being grateful **** So on to the responses!**

**Xitlalit123: Rin will hang around for a bit more ;) You were almost right on the sword part!**

**KagamineRin02: You understand me so well! :D I applaud you for that. Yes, I do get headaches trying to figure out what is to come next and get migranes knowing all of you have been waiting for so long **** thank you.**

**Hazelholy: Thank you!**

**Ten-Faces: He will definitely start catching up more and more…**

**Kayctus: Sorry for not updating sooner and thank you for giving this a second chance/re-discovering it! I'm glad you liked it!**

**ZXCVBNMEM: Emi, you are too lenient on me~~ Too awesome for me! Sorry for letting you down and updating sooooooo late please forgive me~!**

**MercilessSpirit; I have lots of bunnies. Some are named PLOT and others CLIFFHANGER :D Sorry for the lag…**

**Hosgimura Hinata: Sorry for the wait~**

**12domba: Thank you very much!**

**Lolly101: Please tell me you didn't die… the wait was too long…**

** .Tophats: Thanks ;)**

**MikageHime: Sorry for the wait **

**XxDaughter Of EvilxX: I will keep on continuing it, no worries! Thank you very much! **

**xXKiyoneXx: Thank you!**


End file.
